Episode 378: She

[00:00:16] Speaker A: The Mysterious Old Radio Listening Society Podcast welcome to the Mysterious Old Radio Listening Society, a podcast dedicated to suspense, crime and horror stories from the golden age of radio. I'm Eric. I'm Tim. [00:00:36] Speaker B: And I'm Joshua. [00:00:38] Speaker C: We love mysterious old time radio stories, but do they stand the test of time? That's what we're here to find out. [00:00:43] Speaker A: This week I chose she, an episode from CBS Radio's legendary anthology of high adventure, Escape. The script was Adapted from the 1887 novel A History of Adventure by H. Rider Haggard. [00:00:58] Speaker C: One of the founding fathers of the lost world genre, Haggard was a Victorian author who transformed in South Africa into tales of ancient civilizations, mystical relics and doomed obsessions. His breakout novel, King Solomon's Mines, was a publishing sensation, and she, written shortly afterward, became just as popular. Since its initial publication 137 years ago, she has never gone out of print, selling over 80 million copies worldwide. Today, the novel is studied as a prominent example of imperialist literature, reflecting British anxiety over female power and authority and and its relation to the colonized other. [00:01:32] Speaker B: Escape's adaptation distills Haggard's dense 300 some page novel into a slim 29 minutes. How does it compare to the source material, you ask? What did Escape leave out? What did it add? Don't ask me. For once I did not read the book. [00:01:50] Speaker A: So grab your pith helmet and follow your mysterious old hosts as they wander into the perilous realm of she. From from Escape. First broadcast July 11, 1948. [00:02:02] Speaker C: It's late at night and a chill has set in. You're alone and the only light you see is coming from an antique radio. Listen to the sounds coming from the speaker. Listen to the music and listen to the voices. [00:02:14] Speaker D: Fed up with the everyday grind Tired. [00:02:17] Speaker E: Out from the summer heat Want to get away from it all? [00:02:22] Speaker D: We offer you escape. Escape designed to free you from the four walls of today for a half. [00:02:32] Speaker A: Hour of high adventure. [00:02:37] Speaker E: You are deep in a fabulous mountain cavern surrounded by a horde of menacing natives from a lost civilization held at the mercy of the most beautiful woman in the world. The terrible queen called. [00:03:02] Speaker D: Tonight we escape to uncharted Africa and to an incredible adventure as H. Rider Haggard described it in his fantastic story, she. [00:03:21] Speaker E: In those days I was a professor of archaeology at Oxford, and though this may account for my being able to understand some of those strange events which occurred later, it was in no respect the reason for my becoming involved in them. No, the real reason was unbelievably simple. I walked through the caves of the dead in the terrible and ancient city Of KR Crossed the awful abyss and looked upon the flame of life. Only because I was one of the ugliest men in England. Because of my appearance, I had made few acquaintances and only two close friends. Roger Vincy first, and following his death, his son Leo, whom he left behind. And it was that friendship which brought Leo Vincy to my chambers off the quadrangle late in the evening of the day he became 25 years old. [00:04:09] Speaker D: Today was the first I knew of Ed Harley when the attorneys called me in. Yes, they said Father instructed them the week before he died to give me the letter in this little bronze chest on my 25th birthday. [00:04:20] Speaker E: Strange. I mean, chest designs on the lid show Egyptian influence. It must be very old. [00:04:26] Speaker D: Well, according to Father's letter, it contains something over 2000 years old. [00:04:30] Speaker E: Really? [00:04:31] Speaker D: Must have considered it rather important. She's closed the COVID with a lead seal. [00:04:35] Speaker E: Yes, I see. [00:04:37] Speaker D: At any rate, Holly, the letter doesn't tell us much. Suppose we. Suppose we see what's inside. [00:04:46] Speaker E: All right. I have a geology hammer here somewhere, my boy. Here we are. The chisel. You hold it in place on the table. [00:04:54] Speaker D: Go ahead. Ah, there. It's pulling loose. [00:04:59] Speaker E: Yes. Ah, I did it. [00:05:02] Speaker D: Well, here goes. What the devil is that? [00:05:11] Speaker E: Why, it's a clay tile. An old Egyptian writing tablet. Yes, it's the kind used about the time of Nictanabes, around 340 BC but. [00:05:20] Speaker D: The writing on it, it's not Egyptian. It's Greek. [00:05:23] Speaker E: Yes, and parts of it are broken away. Oh, it'll take some time to translate this, Leo. [00:05:29] Speaker D: But father apparently did it, Holly, according to this paper. Listen, here's his translation. [00:05:33] Speaker E: Read it. [00:05:35] Speaker D: I am Anatis, wife of Kallikrates. Say this to you, my son. Forced to escape the wrath of the great Nektana Bees, your father and I fled southward across the waters and wandered for twice 12 moons upon the coast of Libya. [00:05:50] Speaker E: That's the old name for Africa, you know. [00:05:51] Speaker D: Ah. That faces the rising sun there, by the mouth of a river where stands, facing the sea, a great mountain carved like the head of an Ethiopian. [00:06:03] Speaker E: What is it here? [00:06:05] Speaker D: Nothing, Holly. It goes on following the river, we soon fell among. There is a row of asterisks here. [00:06:12] Speaker E: That must be one of the places where the tile's broken. Go on, my boy. [00:06:15] Speaker D: To a hollow mountain where a great city once stood. And to the terrible caves of which no man hath seen the end. And. And to she who must be obeyed. [00:06:24] Speaker E: She who must be obeyed. What's wrong, Leo? [00:06:28] Speaker D: I don't know, Holly. There's something Familiar about that name, but I've never heard it before. Strange. [00:06:36] Speaker E: Well, well, come on, get on with it. [00:06:37] Speaker D: She who must be obeyed, who did lead us by awesome ways to the place where the great pit is. Whose voice is like thunder. And she did show to us the rolling pillar of life and did stand in the flames. And she spake unto my. And there's a large fragment missing here. There isn't very much more. Picks up. Carried far away on the ships where I gave birth to thee and came hither to Athens at last. So I say to thee by these things which I have told, seek out this place, nor stay thy will until thou hast the secret of life for thyself. Sit then on the throne with the pharaoh. That's all, Holly. What's it all about, Leo? [00:07:18] Speaker E: If your father knew, he kept it to himself. I don't know. It's all very strange. [00:07:23] Speaker D: Yes, well, we'll know as soon as we reach the place. [00:07:31] Speaker E: I was hoping you'd say that if you decided not to. I think I should have had a try at finding it alone. [00:07:36] Speaker D: I can't do anything else, Holly. It's more than curiosity. It's almost a compulsion. There's such a familiar feeling about all this. Even that mountain, Holly, shaped like the head of an Ethiopian. [00:07:47] Speaker E: Yes, what about it? [00:07:48] Speaker D: Well, off and on, ever since I was a kid, I've dreamed about a mountain like that. But why, Holly? Why should I? [00:08:02] Speaker E: That was the beginning, and some three months later, we drifted down the east coast of Africa, south of Zanzibar, searching the miles of jungle shores for the mountain carved like a head. There were four of us in the tiny sailing dhow. Leo and I, of course, along with Abdullah, the Arab boatman we'd hired in Arden. And finally, a solid north countryman named Job, my servant. For many years we'd caught no sight of our landmark as yet was. But it native had told us of seeing it once years before somewhere to the south. So our hopes held high. We were confident luck was with us. And so it was. Until one evening, just at dark. [00:08:38] Speaker D: That's a pretty stiff wind, Holly. Yes. You think Abdullah knows what he's doing? [00:08:41] Speaker E: We're rather close inshore. All right, Leo. I doubt if there's any danger. Unless a squall hits by gauzy, we're strangers here in an even land and all. Anything could happen. It could, Jo, but let's assume that it won't, huh? How's the dory making out back there? Oh, trailing along all right behind us. Be in a bad Spot if we lost it. We have guns, food, equipment and everything in it. Yes, I know, Joe. Leo. Perhaps we shouldn't have packed the stuff that way, Leo. I should have kept it on board with us. [00:09:09] Speaker D: No, no, Holly. We want to be ready to shove off up the river as soon as we sight that head. It would be a tough job loading that boat at sea. [00:09:16] Speaker E: We may not have had to, Leo. We've certainly found no reason to so far. [00:09:19] Speaker D: But we will. I dreamed of it. [00:09:21] Speaker E: Hey, Master Ollie. [00:09:23] Speaker A: Luke. [00:09:23] Speaker E: It's the wind driving the water ahead of it. Abdullah, lay under that tiller and head her into it. I'll give him a hand, Holly. [00:09:30] Speaker A: Here. [00:09:31] Speaker E: We've not a chance, sir. Hold on to the mast, Jo. [00:09:33] Speaker D: We shall not. [00:09:40] Speaker E: The great wave plunged over us, tore away the dory, swamped the dow beneath our feet and hurled us headlong into the foaming sea. Half smothered, fighting to stay afloat, borne shoreward by the driver of the tempest, we were tossed at last, one by one, up under the rainswift beach. The calm dawn found us huddled together on the sand at the fringe of a dark and forbidding jungle. At the south lay the mouth of a small river, and to the north the beach ended at the slope of a rocky headland. Leo and Job went to look at the wrecked dory lying at the water's edge a hundred yards away. While I searched the shoreline for some sign of our boatman. I found none. And we never saw Abdullah again. Oh, Holly. [00:10:31] Speaker D: Find any. Any trace of him, Holly? [00:10:32] Speaker E: No sign, Leo. The bridge is gone for good. [00:10:35] Speaker D: Oh, it's too bad. [00:10:37] Speaker E: What? Tapes the door hinge over wrecked. Not a chance of fixing it. But the equipment seems to be all right, sir. Oh, good. It's all there, isn't it? [00:10:45] Speaker D: Yes, most of it. The lashings held in the waterproof case is still up. [00:10:47] Speaker E: Very well. [00:10:48] Speaker D: Only trouble is, we're afoot. [00:10:50] Speaker E: Yes, we're going to have a lot of trouble following the coastline. [00:10:52] Speaker D: We won't follow any coastline, Holly. [00:10:54] Speaker E: What? [00:10:55] Speaker D: We're going up that river. Take a look at that headland there to the north. It shows up better from the wreck, Holly, but with the sun coming up now, you can see it from here. Too high. [00:11:04] Speaker E: Goom it shaped like a human egg. That's it. That's the landmark. [00:11:07] Speaker D: Right, Holly. And that's the river. Kallikrates followed with his wife. The same one we are going to follow. [00:11:12] Speaker E: Oh, but Leo, with the boat gone, we shall have to break trail through that jungle and follow that riverbed. [00:11:16] Speaker D: Yes, we'd Better get started. [00:11:18] Speaker E: Look, gentlemen, why can't we just stay here and try to signal some ship? [00:11:21] Speaker D: Oh, there's not much chance of a job. They stay pretty clear of this coast. But anyway, this is what we've been looking for. [00:11:26] Speaker E: I don't really know what we are looking for, Leo. It's been more than 2000 years since Kallikrates went up that river. Things must have changed a great deal by now. [00:11:34] Speaker D: Holly. Holly, that carved head up there in the mountain. It looks exactly the way it always did when I dreamed about it. [00:11:40] Speaker E: It's incredible. [00:11:41] Speaker D: I have a strange feeling that whatever Kallikrates and his wife found back there in the jungle will still be waiting there today. [00:11:55] Speaker E: For five heart steaming days we pushed inland through the jungle, following the banks of the muddy river mile by mile. The creeping undergrowth became more dense, the river shallowed and became sluggish and the swamplands began to stretch out from the low banks. Foul pools and stagnant lagoons full of soft black mud covered over with a green scum made every step a hazard. Crocodiles slid away at our approach and bright colored snakes glided out from underfoot. Mile after mile we forced our way through those evil swamps, each mile more difficult. And finally came the morning of the sixth day. [00:12:40] Speaker D: Oh, I don't know, Holly. If it gets any worse, we'll never make it. [00:12:47] Speaker E: Excuse me. Booting and gentlemen. Yes, Joe? I say we should turn back. Oh, no, Joe. We've spent five days getting this far. It'd be ashamed to waste it. [00:12:57] Speaker D: It's just the way I feel. We'll keep on as long as we can. [00:13:02] Speaker E: Oh, what, Leo, was it? [00:13:03] Speaker D: Oh, I know. I stumbled over something in the mire. Here, take a look at it. [00:13:09] Speaker E: It's a rock. [00:13:10] Speaker D: Look. [00:13:12] Speaker E: Yes, it's a square stone. It's been hand cut. There's another. It's a section of an old wall of some sort of a dike. [00:13:22] Speaker D: That's it, Holly. A long time ago the river was held between stone dikes along here like a sort of canal. [00:13:28] Speaker E: It's possible that might account for the swampland. The dikes gradually fell to pieces and the river spread out through the jungle, of course. [00:13:34] Speaker D: And Holly, there could be only one reason for building them. So that boats or barges could come in from the ocean to some kind of a city. [00:13:41] Speaker E: A city. Gentlemen, why don't we turn back while we can? City. It had to be a long time ago. Centuries ago. [00:13:47] Speaker D: Now it could still be there. Holly, this place has never been explored. Nobody would ever try to come through these swamps. [00:13:52] Speaker E: It may include us if it keeps Job. What's the matter with you? [00:13:56] Speaker D: He must be. Oh. Oh, look. [00:14:00] Speaker E: Natives. Where the devil did they come from? [00:14:05] Speaker D: I don't know. Strange looking brutes. Look at those clothes they're wearing. [00:14:11] Speaker E: Yes, I've never seen any quite like them except in Egob e bakani biko. [00:14:21] Speaker D: Do you recognize that dialect? [00:14:22] Speaker B: No. [00:14:22] Speaker E: It's a little like Arabic. I might try that. I've never heard anything like it before. [00:14:33] Speaker D: Seem to want us to come along with them, Holly. [00:14:36] Speaker E: Yes. [00:14:37] Speaker D: You think we'd better chance it? [00:14:38] Speaker E: Well, they outnumber us 30 to 1, Leo. [00:14:41] Speaker D: Yes, and they're all carrying those stabbing knives. [00:14:45] Speaker A: Well. [00:14:48] Speaker D: Hang on to your guns. They don't seem to know what they're for. Let's go. [00:14:58] Speaker E: Our strange escort moved rapidly ahead, twisting and turning as they followed some well remembered trail of their own. We rested during the night on a hummock of dry ground and struck out again at dawn. It was late afternoon when we left the swamp and climbed up a long slope to the foot of the rock walled mountain. Reaching its base, we entered the mouth of a great cavern. And a short way inside we led into a small side chamber carved from the living rock and lighted by a reed wick floating in a jug of oil. And then the strange natives went away and left us and we sat about on the floor trying to plan some course of action. [00:15:39] Speaker D: Oh, dear. How long do you suppose we've been here, Holly? [00:15:45] Speaker E: Close to two hours, I'd say. [00:15:47] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:15:47] Speaker E: Must be dark outside by now. [00:15:50] Speaker D: Holly, do you have any idea what race they belong to? They're not like any other natives in this part of Africa. [00:15:55] Speaker E: Oh, I've seen people much like them in some of the villages in southern Egypt, Leo, but I don't know any more about it than that. [00:16:00] Speaker D: Wear those odd tunics too. Cotton or linen, I suppose those bronze headbands must have been out of contact with the rest of the world for centuries, Oliver. [00:16:10] Speaker E: Heathens, that's what they are. And up to no good so far as we're concerned. That's what I say. You'd be right, Joe. But I still want to find out about the other things Ammonites wrote on the tile. The City of Khor and the Pillar of Fire and she who Must Be Obeyed. [00:16:21] Speaker D: They found the caves at least, though I can't see anything so terrible about them. [00:16:25] Speaker E: Perhaps we haven't seen everything. The cave. [00:16:30] Speaker D: Oh, then I hope our little chum, then I b. [00:16:36] Speaker E: He seems to want us to follow him. Well, hang on to your guns. [00:16:40] Speaker D: Right you are. Stick close together. Don't let them separate us. All right, Job. Come. Let's go. [00:16:50] Speaker E: Our strange guide led us along the twisting, branching passageways, lighting our way with a flaming torch that threw weird shadows on the walls of solid rock. Now and then we passed side chambers lined with long rows of stone slabs. Then I saw that each slab held the sheeted figure of a human body. And I realized these caves were one vast crypt filled with the mummified bodies of some vanished race. Gradually, as we moved on, a most remarkable sound began to grow louder, made up of the guttural voices of a crowd, the throbbing of drums and the moan of some strange musical instrument. Suddenly, the narrow passage opened out into a great hallowed cavern where natives danced and postured in the eerie glare from a hundred huge torches placed about the walls. I stared in amazement, for the torches were flaming mummies tied upright to the posts. And the guide had lighted our way through the passages with a human arm. Nebuch Borgden. [00:17:51] Speaker D: I. I think he means for us to walk toward that platform in the center. [00:17:55] Speaker E: Yes. There's a pit of cold burning in the top of it. Hey, Book. [00:17:59] Speaker D: Yes? Come on. Watch it, Holly. I don't like the looks of this. [00:18:03] Speaker E: All right. Keep your gun handy, Leo. Stay right with this, Joe. [00:18:05] Speaker D: They look anything but friendly. [00:18:07] Speaker E: If anything starts, try to get on the platform. They've got no weapons except those stabbing knives, remember? [00:18:12] Speaker D: Well, here we are. Now what? [00:18:17] Speaker E: The binding. It's quite some fire they've got built up. I can't understand what they need to do. [00:18:25] Speaker D: Job, look out. [00:18:25] Speaker E: Holly. [00:18:26] Speaker D: They killed Job. [00:18:26] Speaker E: The devil's back against the wall here. Ah, Come on, pick up. Watch it. [00:18:29] Speaker D: Here they come. All right. [00:18:30] Speaker E: You stab Job without a chance. [00:18:33] Speaker A: What? [00:18:33] Speaker D: On your left, Holly. Let's try for the fleet. What the juice is this old man in a long white robe? [00:18:45] Speaker E: Hold your gun ready, Leo. We'll see what happens. [00:18:53] Speaker D: They're scared to death of him, whoever he is. [00:18:55] Speaker E: Wait. He's coming our way. I presume you speak English, gentlemen? Yes. [00:19:04] Speaker D: But you do occasionally. Natives from the south have come through the swamps, and we have captured them. I have learned many of the languages. [00:19:14] Speaker E: Of the outside world. I am Billali. [00:19:20] Speaker D: Leo Vincey. This is Mr. Holly. I am most sorrowful for the death of your companion. Oh, yes. Poor Joe. [00:19:27] Speaker E: My children had no excuse. [00:19:30] Speaker D: They know the law. From now on, you will be allowed to complete freedom. No white man is ever to be eaten. [00:19:38] Speaker E: Eaten? [00:19:39] Speaker D: That is what would have been done to you. But rest assured, her law is just. And their punishment will be Swift. Whose law? That of she who Must be obeyed. [00:19:52] Speaker A: Holly. [00:19:53] Speaker D: This is it, Holly. We're still on the right trail. She has demanded your presence. I have come to take you to the place where she is. [00:20:02] Speaker E: Tell me, Billali, who or what is this she who must be obeyed? A goddess? A queen? A white woman? [00:20:09] Speaker D: I could not say, my son. I have never seen she come along. [00:20:24] Speaker E: Again through those tortuous passages. Two of us now, with kindly old Billali leading the way until he left us alone at last in a large chamber hung with brilliant colored silks, fitted with soft divans and lighted by crystal lamps. We stood there several minutes, not speaking, wondering, when suddenly the curtains across the doorway parted and a most amazing figure stood before us. It was swathed in folds of filmy white draperies, with soft gauzy veils covering even the face and hands. [00:21:02] Speaker F: I bid you welcome to the city of Kr. Kallikrates. And friend of Kallikrates. [00:21:08] Speaker D: I, I, I, I'm not Kallikrates. I. I'm Leo Vincy, and. And this is my friend, Mr. Holly. [00:21:14] Speaker F: Leo Vincy. Vengeance. No matter. You will understand. [00:21:20] Speaker D: Are you. [00:21:21] Speaker F: I am she. [00:21:24] Speaker E: You must forgive us if we find it difficult to understand this. What is all this? These caves. The natives. What is kr? [00:21:33] Speaker F: KR is a great city that rose up and then died many thousand years ago. These are the caves of kr. The city itself stands farther on, in a huge crater at the heart of the mountain. [00:21:44] Speaker D: Are you a descendant of Kor? [00:21:47] Speaker F: I came from another place far away, and Cor was dead long before I found it. The natives know me as a fearsome figure in white, and they obey me. [00:21:57] Speaker E: They have never seen you? [00:21:59] Speaker F: No, Holly. Not one of them has ever seen behind these veils. [00:22:03] Speaker D: It's amazing to think that Kallikrates must have been here in this same place over 2,000 years ago. [00:22:10] Speaker F: 2,287 years ago, Kallikrates died in this very chamber. [00:22:16] Speaker E: You. You speak as though you saw it happen. [00:22:19] Speaker F: I did see it happen. I killed him. [00:22:22] Speaker D: But you couldn't. That was over 2,000 years ago. [00:22:29] Speaker F: Yes, and at that time, I had been here in Core for more than 500 years. [00:22:34] Speaker E: Impossible. [00:22:35] Speaker F: How do you know? You haven't seen me. [00:22:38] Speaker D: But then you claim to be immortal. [00:22:41] Speaker F: Yes, as he could have been had he stepped with me into the flames of life. As you can be my Callicrates, if you so choose. [00:22:49] Speaker E: I, I hope you'll forgive me, but I, I can't believe anything so fantastic. [00:22:54] Speaker F: Is it proof? You need proof that I once did an evil act in anger and paid for it by waiting alone through all these centuries. Proof that my waiting is ended now. Then, look upon it behind this curtain. [00:23:10] Speaker D: A mummy. A mummy like those out in the caves. [00:23:15] Speaker F: But look at the face, Leo. [00:23:19] Speaker D: It's you. That's you lying there. [00:23:23] Speaker F: That is the body of Kallikrates, whom I loved and whom I killed in anger. When he refused to leave her and stay with me to become immortal, his wife, Amenaretes fled across the mountains and later gave birth to his son, your ancestor. [00:23:38] Speaker E: Then, Leo, that clay tile has been handed down in your family for over 20 centuries. [00:23:44] Speaker F: I have paid for my sin. And I have waited, knowing that someday my Kallikrates would be born to me again, would come back to Cor and find me. [00:23:52] Speaker D: It was as though I had to. I dreamed of that carved mountain before I'd ever seen it. And your name? She who Must Be Obeyed. It struck some chord in my memory the first time I heard it. [00:24:05] Speaker F: It is your heart that must be obeyed now, my beloved. The decision is yours. Whether to leave me once again now that you have found me, or to walk with me into the pillar of Life, to love me and to become immortal. [00:24:19] Speaker D: Yes. I feel somehow that this is the ending of something I've been moving toward all my life, Leo. But it isn't possible. Immortality. And how can you love someone you've never seen? [00:24:36] Speaker F: Then you shall see, my beloved. I've worn these veils for you. And for you I. [00:24:44] Speaker D: Look. [00:24:46] Speaker F: Oh. [00:24:52] Speaker E: The soft veil slid off from her shoulders and she stood revealed before us, the most beautiful woman the world has ever seen. [00:25:04] Speaker F: Will you leave me now, my Kallikrates, or come with me to the flame of life? [00:25:09] Speaker D: I'll go with you anywhere. [00:25:12] Speaker A: Anywhere. [00:25:21] Speaker E: We talked the night away in the chamber, Leo and I, fascinated by every word that fell from those lovely lips. She talked of the hidden knowledge of ancient lands, sang softly of her thoughts in rhyme, and spoke once again the words of long dead poets forgotten by the world. She made us believe in her own immortality. And in hours to come and before dawn, Bilhali with us. We followed her madly and joyously through the dim and dusty passage that led to the flame of life. We came to a great abyss with a narrow ledge crossing over it like a rainbow rock. There Billali waited, and we three went on alone. At the sight of the awful depths beneath us, Leo and I shuddered in spite of ourselves and moved carefully step by step. She never hesitated, but swayed along gaily before us like a feather borne on a Breeze. Finally, we stood in a vast circular chamber, a great bubble in the earth's crust, whose walls were shining black basalt. [00:26:30] Speaker D: Holly. [00:26:31] Speaker C: Yes? [00:26:32] Speaker D: See there by the wall? It looks like the body of a man. [00:26:35] Speaker F: An old philosopher, my beloved, who came here many centuries ago. He sat and watched the flame and could not decide whether he should become immortal. Finally, he died. [00:26:46] Speaker E: And you? Have you never regretted becoming immortal? [00:26:51] Speaker F: I could not have waited for Kallikrates, Holly, had I not been immortal. But you, Leo, perhaps you have doubts. [00:27:00] Speaker D: Immortality will not even be long enough with you. Where is the listen? [00:27:07] Speaker F: Even now it approaches, it advances and then retreats. A never ending cycle of life. It has moved along its path through this cavern since the beginning of time. [00:27:15] Speaker D: Holly, look. [00:27:17] Speaker F: Do not fear it, beloved. See, this time I will step into the flame alone. And when it comes again, you may join me. [00:27:23] Speaker D: It's like the fire of the sun and the dust of a million diamonds. [00:27:29] Speaker E: As the great and terrible pillar of fire, she threw off her veils and opened her arms to it, and the eternal fire flowed over her. It passed and left her there, standing with her head bowed. [00:27:53] Speaker D: You. I. Are you all right? It didn't harm you? [00:27:56] Speaker F: No, My beloved. Can one find harm in the flame that created life itself? Do you believe that? [00:28:05] Speaker D: What? [00:28:05] Speaker F: That. [00:28:06] Speaker D: What's wrong? Tell me what's wrong. [00:28:09] Speaker F: The flame was different somehow. Now that Kallikrates has returned, the curse of everlasting life is lifted. [00:28:20] Speaker E: Leo. She's aging. Growing old. [00:28:23] Speaker F: No, I. Oh, no, I do not. If I. Go, search for me. [00:28:30] Speaker E: Search. Merciful heavens. Oh, no. [00:28:33] Speaker D: No. [00:28:36] Speaker E: Even as Leo's hands reached out to touch her, they closed on a dry heap of soft gray dust. I knew now that neither of us would step into the flame. And I knew we would spend our lives searching through the world for she. I seemed to hear in my mind once again words she had spoken in those glorious hours the night before. I knew that Leo was hearing them too. And that neither of us, so long as we lived, could ever forget that lovely voice. [00:29:33] Speaker F: Nay, not in core, but in whatever spot in town or field or by the insatiate sea, men brood on buried loves or unforgot, or break themselves on some divine decree, or would o' erleap the limits of their lot. There in the tombs and deathless dwelleth she. [00:30:20] Speaker D: Escape. [00:30:21] Speaker A: Produced and Directed by Norman MacDonald Tonight brought to you she by H. Rider Haggard. [00:30:27] Speaker D: Adapted for radio by Les Crutchfield with editorial supervision by John Dunkle. [00:30:32] Speaker A: Featured in tonight's cast were Barry Kroger, Larry Dobkin, Kay Brinker, Ben Wright and Wilms Herbert. Special music by Ivan Ditmars. [00:30:44] Speaker D: Next week, you are clinging precariously to. [00:30:48] Speaker E: A diving, pitching longboat lashed by mountainous. [00:30:52] Speaker D: Seas in the center of a hurricane. [00:30:54] Speaker E: And at the helm, driving you on. [00:30:57] Speaker D: Is a man bent on revenge and. [00:31:00] Speaker E: Willing to kill for it. [00:31:10] Speaker D: Next week, we escape with Fr. Buckley's exciting story Habit. [00:31:14] Speaker A: Good night, then, until this same time. [00:31:16] Speaker D: Next week, when once again, we offer you Escape. [00:31:26] Speaker A: This is cbs, the Columbia Broadcasting System. That was she from Escape. Here on the mysterious old Radio Listening Society podcast, once again, I'm Eric. [00:31:38] Speaker C: I'm Tim. [00:31:39] Speaker B: And I'm Joshua. [00:31:40] Speaker A: That was my pick. I brought it to the table this week for us to delve into. I will tell you the backstory. Kid graduated, my kid. And she graduated from a school in Chicago. So we were visiting for four days and we went to a lot of bookstores because my wife. Not because of me, and I go to bookstores and find the one comfy chair. Anyway, she in one of these bookstores bought a bunch of books, of course, and she showed them to me. And she goes, so I found this book, and I've never heard of it, and I don't know what's going on. And it's called she. And she read the, you know, back cover, did a little research online. She goes, and I was thinking, I want to read this because I think there's some potential here for this to be a radio show. And I go, wait a minute. In the hotel room, I go, she. And I get on my computer and I go, I'm pretty sure that's an episode of Escape. And she goes, oh, really? And I go, yeah. In fact, as I'm looking here, it's been done a number of times. So we start delving into this. Everything you said in the intro that was written, we discovered it was a lost world genre, the beginning of this whole thing, that it was incredibly popular, that it is still popular, at least as a discussion tool of is it stand the test of time or not? Still selling worldwide. We did not know anything about this, right? We didn't know this person, this author. And she got like a 1920 version, you know, like this old version. Yeah, it's old. And she's like, I think this should be a good radio show. So I sent her this, right? Saying, well, let's hear how Escape does it and see if we can do it better. She goes, I'm assuming something written that long ago that takes place in Africa is problematic. She goes, maybe I can help with it. Anyway, that's how all this came about. [00:33:35] Speaker B: I'm surprised you don't know this author. Just because King Solomon's Minds was a big influence on Indiana Jones. [00:33:41] Speaker A: Right, I know that, but I don't know anything about it. [00:33:43] Speaker C: So y' all want me to blow your minds? [00:33:45] Speaker A: Yes. [00:33:47] Speaker C: Remember hardcover theater? [00:33:48] Speaker B: Oh, yeah. [00:33:49] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. [00:33:50] Speaker C: I was in it. [00:33:51] Speaker A: Oh, there was a stage adaptation of She. [00:33:54] Speaker C: I played Job. [00:33:56] Speaker A: Crazy. Wow. [00:33:59] Speaker B: Did you just stomp around and say heathen a lot? [00:34:02] Speaker C: I was mostly like, we should go. This is not good. [00:34:05] Speaker B: I like that the character named Jobe has no faith in this cover whatsoever. Ironically named. [00:34:12] Speaker C: It's been a while, but I think I have read it. [00:34:14] Speaker B: I think I saw this one too. Right. He had the little ribbons as the eternal flames that they walked through. It was used with a fan. Yeah. For those who aren't of a certain age living in the Twin Cities, hardcover theater here did exclusively adaptations of old public domain novels. And they would do them on a purposely low budget scale in a very creative, intentional way. [00:34:40] Speaker A: And to bring it all the way around, it was hardcover theater is how we all met each other, how we first worked together. That's how we first worked together was doing London after Mid London After Midnight. [00:34:51] Speaker C: Was a sort of mishmash of many of these old stories. [00:34:53] Speaker A: Right. And so that was the first time we were ever on stage. Said, wow, that's all. Look at all of this information. Tim, tell him stuff. [00:35:01] Speaker C: Go to Goose. No, you mean actually tell them we. [00:35:03] Speaker A: Have to talk about this. So I of course didn't read it, but I did read the synopsis of it because I saw that there was this giant 300 page novel and I was like, wow, they're going to do a 30 minute version of this. So I read the synopsis of it. [00:35:20] Speaker B: Maybe those. Open some synopsis bookstores you can go into and just browse through all the. [00:35:27] Speaker A: It's called. What were they called? Cliff Notes. [00:35:30] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:35:30] Speaker A: That's how I got through college. So. But those books are huge anyway. Not Clifford the Big Red Dog books. So. All right, so I got a gist of what goes on here. I'm going to tell you based on that gist of the plot points of everything. It moved fast and they did leave some stuff out. But overall, a 29 minute adaptation of that gigantic novel, I think they kind of hit it. I think they kind of nailed. At least. I'm not talking about production. I'm saying, wow, you really got all of most of that in. [00:36:11] Speaker B: Broadly speaking. I will say that it struck me that way, not being familiar with the source material other than I had the cultural familiarity with the author, But I've never read the book. I felt like this should be more of a jumbled message and it was surprisingly coherent. [00:36:29] Speaker A: Right? [00:36:30] Speaker C: Yeah. It's like that Willy Wonka full meal and a piece of gum of like, yeah, this is all the flavors. [00:36:36] Speaker A: Right. [00:36:37] Speaker C: Without actually eating the meal. [00:36:38] Speaker A: It's a great analysis. [00:36:40] Speaker B: Yeah. I mean, the question is, is that satisfying? [00:36:43] Speaker A: Right. [00:36:44] Speaker B: And just simply having all the flavors there. [00:36:46] Speaker A: Right. There's not a lot of time spent delving into anything. You're just hitting the beats as fast as you can. [00:36:54] Speaker B: Yeah, it's Pacey, but not in a thrilling way. It moves, but sort of like one of those conveyor walkways at the airport. Not like a roller coaster ride. [00:37:03] Speaker A: Right, right, right. [00:37:04] Speaker B: It's less what's going to happen next and more like, oh, I get to put my suitcase down. It's a different kind of joy. [00:37:11] Speaker A: Right. [00:37:12] Speaker C: As you might imagine, the setup not missing a lot there. The journey all the way to Call of Flame. Like, there's a lot missing there. [00:37:22] Speaker B: Oh, so you've read this? [00:37:23] Speaker C: Yes. [00:37:23] Speaker B: I can never guess what you have and haven't read. [00:37:26] Speaker C: I'm surprised you have not read this. [00:37:28] Speaker B: You're a black box to me, and I'm glad I can be a black. [00:37:31] Speaker A: Box back at you. Anyway, the guy's name, the main guy, apparently in the novel, when he gets to this land and the tribe takes them prisoner, he ends up falling in love with one of the. The women from the tribe and marrying that woman. And when they do find she who you must obey, she's angry that the reincarnation of what she's been waiting for is married and she kills her totally. [00:38:01] Speaker B: Oh, so there's conflict in the actual novel. [00:38:05] Speaker C: The main thing, the main difference that I would pay attention to was I pretty sure Job lives quite a bit longer. [00:38:13] Speaker A: Yeah, five seconds. [00:38:14] Speaker B: It feels like what we're saying is the novel is longer. [00:38:19] Speaker C: Well, there's a lot more events that happen. [00:38:23] Speaker B: I suppose it's the same that it's obstacles, exciting adventure. Y obstacles Right here. They just get thrown out of a boat. [00:38:30] Speaker A: Yes. [00:38:31] Speaker B: And then they get on the airport walkway and they end up in the cave. [00:38:35] Speaker C: To actually get into discussion and criticism of elements. One of the things that sits with me wrong about this story in general is how much destiny is just like watching destiny drive its own little toy trucks around of, like, they get thrown out of the boat where the river turns. And like, I think of it as I often do in game terms, of it's an adventure on rails. You go, here, you look at that thing, it moves you to that thing. And it's. The characters are basically motivated by just following to the next step of whatever destiny is pushing them at. [00:39:13] Speaker A: Right. [00:39:14] Speaker B: And I mean, that mirrors obviously the whole idea of the British Empire and imperialism. Like we're destined as the superior race to being called to this thing. Yes, called to this thing. And we will raise these other savages up along with us, but still keep them much lower. So, yes, that is why it is studied. But I think this one has an extra layer of fascination to contemporary scholars because of the positioning of She. I have read analysis too. Where people thought, are they talking about Queen Victoria? Is they're kind of presenting her as dark and vengeful. But also there's some virtue there, too. I mean, it's hard to tell in this adaptation because she just appears to be a beautiful sex object that immediately makes them both go and speak in this breathy, sexually expectant tone. It's a kind of funny scene when she reveals her face and they just have very mundane dialogue, that's all spoken. [00:40:07] Speaker C: Like, oh, Veil coming off her shoulders. [00:40:12] Speaker A: Leo. Protagonist Leo. That's his name. [00:40:15] Speaker B: Oh, yes. [00:40:16] Speaker A: It's also weirdly why the Pope chose his name from this book. The Pope said, I love she the book. So I'm going to be Leo. I'm pretty sure that's not true. [00:40:29] Speaker B: I'm sure that's true. [00:40:34] Speaker C: I love the ugly guy. Like, I've had two friends in my life. My best friend and when he died, his son. And someday I hope to be best. [00:40:43] Speaker B: Friends with that guy's son because I'm so ugly. I don't know if it's true of the book, but one of the disappointing aspects to this drama is just how generic and dull the characters seem. And the I was the ugliest man in the world piques my interest at the top because, I mean, oh, how is this going to play into this character? How did these events that happened to him in, you know, in his past is how they led him to here. But no, it's just a throwaway line that he didn't have many friends and if he had more friends, he would have been just hanging out with them instead of meeting sheep in Libya. Africa once called Libya. [00:41:23] Speaker C: Fun fact. [00:41:24] Speaker B: Once called Pangea's midriff. [00:41:28] Speaker A: Sorry. There was something I read about what the significance was of him being ugly. [00:41:33] Speaker C: I don't know if there's a significance outside of the plot. [00:41:36] Speaker B: Well, I. People would read into A ugly old man and a young virile man. In Leo, it seemed like they were setting up some sort of duality there. And maybe they play that out more in the novel, but they don't really play it out here. Or if that was like, I'm the ugliest man in the world. This is the only way I would ever spend time with an attractive woman. If I go to the former country of Libya, what's the name of the city core? I'm assuming in the novel we get a lot more of those descriptions of an underground cavern of mummies that are so ubiquitous they are being used as torches. [00:42:18] Speaker C: I think that's the most vivid thing that you just can't leave out is the. We make candles out of bodies. [00:42:23] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah. It's got everything that I want. It's high adventure. That thing that I talk about all the time on this podcast that just not too long ago, many parts of the world just seems so undiscovered and possibly full of all sorts of things that we could never have imagined. This had all of the markings of that. And as I said, as we discovered the book and then, all right, I'm going to listen to this. Anna was Escape, Right. It's such a good show. It might be my favorite. And it's always so well done. I just, you know, not quite jumping to the vote, but I was mostly disappointed, I thought. But I'm going to say this, that's the best you can do with this book. If you have 29 minutes to tell the story, I defy you. [00:43:13] Speaker B: Yes, you can. It goes back to your comparison to the bubble gum Willy Wonka bubblegum. It's like, yeah, you did it, but why? [00:43:25] Speaker A: Right? [00:43:25] Speaker B: Yeah, it's a novel and there's a reason it was that length to begin with because you just don't really have much of a conflict. You have this brush with cannibalism. Right. [00:43:39] Speaker A: They're gonna eat you. [00:43:40] Speaker B: We have a strict no eat white man, the other white meat. [00:43:45] Speaker A: Right. [00:43:47] Speaker B: So you feel like, okay, that's probably six chapters in the novel where. Where people are trying to eat them, or I'm exaggerating, but just sort of briefly thrown away. [00:43:57] Speaker A: I was really hoping for. We've slightly touched on this in this podcast, but there is a series called Moon Over Africa, which I love. It's problematic, but I love and I had that hope for that kind of feel for this. It falls short. But Moon over Africa was 2615 minute episodes. They had a lot of time to delve. This really could have Benefited from just one hour or a two parter, to be clear. [00:44:27] Speaker C: Haggard between King Solomon's minds and this like Raider of the Lost Ark. Just almost all pulp adventure owes Paige to. [00:44:37] Speaker A: Right. Which is why I was excited because of everything we're talking about, everything we're saying is why I brought it to the podcast. This was the discussion I wanted to have about the author of this. And then of course, the show itself. But it could have been. I don't know if it could have been. I don't know if you could do this in a half an hour in any way, shape or form. [00:45:00] Speaker C: I think to try to articulate it for myself. It successfully reduces the narrative down and then fails to capture the energy of it. [00:45:13] Speaker A: Conflict, suspense, terror. [00:45:16] Speaker B: Static. [00:45:16] Speaker A: Yeah, it's pretty static. [00:45:18] Speaker B: I love the segment where they. And it's a throwaway line again, probably from the novel. But when they see the body of the old philosopher who could not decide whether or not to go through the flames and sat there in indecision until he died, from my point of view, I'm like, that's the story. I want to hear that capsule there as a synopsis. That sounds like the synopsis for like a Jorge Luis Borges story. [00:45:48] Speaker A: Right? [00:45:48] Speaker B: Like this. Very philosophical. I feel like there's more energy in that little description than in all of what they put out there. [00:45:57] Speaker C: Try to remember, because it's been a long time since I read it. [00:46:01] Speaker E: If I read it. But I'm pretty sure I read it. [00:46:03] Speaker B: Oh, oh, now we're getting to the number. If I read it. [00:46:07] Speaker C: Because it's been a long time. [00:46:08] Speaker B: You went to the synopsis store. [00:46:12] Speaker C: But there was a conflict of, like, when it's. So I want you to step into the flames. And the unsure. Like, she might be trying to kill me. Yeah, that wasn't here. [00:46:22] Speaker A: I do think it's interesting from the story. [00:46:25] Speaker C: She who Must Be Obeyed. This will be hilarious. Come under the fire. [00:46:33] Speaker A: That she can't purify herself twice. That kills her. And she doesn't know that her return. [00:46:42] Speaker C: That she had somehow been changed by reuniting with reincarnated spirit. That was kind of ephemeral gobbledygook. [00:46:52] Speaker A: But yeah, I didn't catch that. And how she wouldn't know that. [00:46:56] Speaker B: The idea presented in the episode is that Leo, who looks identical because he. [00:47:04] Speaker A: Is him, he's reincarnated him. [00:47:06] Speaker B: But the episode suggests it's this long lineage. So it has this idea, at least from a contemporary point of view. Like almost like some sort of genetic perfection required to reach this point, however it is, or he's finally the perfect reincarnation and the others were less perfect. That changes the fire. I mean, that makes zero sense. But that's literally what the script says, what she says. And she's she who must be obeyed, not she who's always right. [00:47:35] Speaker A: Right. [00:47:36] Speaker B: Sometimes they seem like the same thing. [00:47:38] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. Aisha, by the way, is the name in the book of the Shia. That line, where. Where do you come from? From someplace far away. And it isn't even in the novel, really discovery or discussed where she originated from. And I think that much like your philosopher of indecisiveness, that's where I want to see the prequel to this. Like, where did she come from? [00:48:08] Speaker B: Well, and on that topic, I thought it was fascinating in an era where they weren't afraid to just say, yeah, the most beautiful in the world, a woman in the world would of course be white, that they leave any physical description to your imagination. [00:48:27] Speaker A: Right. [00:48:27] Speaker B: They just say she's the most beautiful woman in the world. They don't attribute a. [00:48:31] Speaker C: In the film, it was Ursula Andress. [00:48:35] Speaker B: Good casting. [00:48:37] Speaker A: What year is it? A 60s, a 50s, early 60s. [00:48:40] Speaker C: 60S, yeah. [00:48:41] Speaker A: Have you seen it? [00:48:42] Speaker C: Yeah, it's. [00:48:43] Speaker A: Is it terrible? [00:48:45] Speaker C: I think it's a hammer. It's Hammer esque. [00:48:47] Speaker B: If not hammer, Ursula would seem Hammer esque. Casting. [00:48:51] Speaker C: Sorry, I'm gonna make splick noises. [00:48:53] Speaker A: What does hammer mean? [00:48:54] Speaker C: Hammer horror films. Like Peter Cushing. Wow. [00:48:58] Speaker A: Okay, teach me. [00:49:00] Speaker B: I'm sure we. [00:49:00] Speaker A: Don't roll your eyes at me. [00:49:01] Speaker C: Sorry. [00:49:02] Speaker A: Learn me. [00:49:04] Speaker C: It's because you like Dracula so much. Hammer made a very iconic Dracula. [00:49:09] Speaker A: Yeah. There's only one Dracula. I don't watch any of the other ones. The rest are awful. [00:49:14] Speaker B: All you other Draculas, get off my lawn. [00:49:19] Speaker A: There was Lugosi and then we were done. [00:49:22] Speaker C: 1965 British adventure made by Hammer Film Productions. I'm so smart. That's what I consider smart. [00:49:33] Speaker A: Okay. But people don't. This recording session is the first time in 10 years that we've actually brought laptops with us. And we're looking. Get up. [00:49:47] Speaker B: Speaking of looking things up, she recites what is clearly a poem at the end. And I was like, is that from the novel? That seems odd. I just. So I googled it. [00:49:58] Speaker A: Yeah, it's from where the sidewalk ends. [00:50:00] Speaker B: Exactly. She who Must be obeyed will not take the garbage out. And if the Internet is not lying to me, never does. That is a poem by the Scottish writer and anthropologist and folklorist Andrew Lange, and it was written after she was published. It was a piece of fan fiction poetry dedicated to HRH H. Rider Haggard. And Andrew Lang also co wrote with someone else whose name I don't remember, a parody the next year of this novel called He. So Les Crutchfield incorporated fan fiction into this script. So she is writing a poem dedicated to her by fan. [00:50:59] Speaker A: That's a lot of layers. [00:51:00] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:51:01] Speaker A: He who says okay, if I have to. [00:51:06] Speaker B: Oh. Since most of this podcast is just turned into all the influences she has had, but not much of a discussion of the actual radio show because there's not much there. A lot of listeners such as myself were probably first made aware of she through the great British television show Rumpole of the Bailey. Anyone watch? I know Eric has never watched Rumpole of the Bailey. [00:51:27] Speaker A: No, but I guessed his name, so I got to get my baby back. [00:51:38] Speaker B: He famously calls his wife throughout that series she who must be obeyed as a nod to she. [00:51:44] Speaker A: She. Let's vote. Joshua, you get to start. [00:51:47] Speaker B: It's fun enough. Like, I think we already voted. It has. Clearly based on our long discussion here. It's historically really fascinating and really interesting and a compelling failed experiment. Can't condense a novel into 30 minutes. I mean, sometime we'll bring Peter Lorre's mystery in the air. 30 minute adaptation of Crime and Punishment. [00:52:13] Speaker A: Is that a real thing? [00:52:14] Speaker B: It's a real thing. [00:52:15] Speaker A: Oh my God. Really? [00:52:16] Speaker B: In all fairness, he was also in a film. So you could argue It's a 30 minute adaptation of Peter Lorre's hour and a half film adaptation of Crime and Punishment. But still not a great idea. [00:52:30] Speaker A: No, it's terrible. Terrible idea. [00:52:33] Speaker C: I believe we have all voted already. Escape does great work. Technically, this is well made. But to achieve the plot beats they needed to get, they sacrificed the fun of the story. [00:52:45] Speaker A: Yeah, they bit off more than they can chew for sure. But it was super fun to listen to them try. If anybody's gonna try, it was the actors, directors, writers, producers, and everybody involved with Escape. That was a great idea. Like, who could possibly do that, you know, at least it wasn't Nightfall. [00:53:07] Speaker B: I would love to hear Hermit's Cave. [00:53:10] Speaker A: Or I'm trying to think of something. [00:53:12] Speaker D: Weird circle. [00:53:12] Speaker A: Weird circle. So they are the most equipped to attempt this. I. I think somebody should have finished the script, took a look around, said, this is. We can't pull this up. [00:53:23] Speaker B: I also think too bad they didn't do two parters. [00:53:25] Speaker A: Yeah, exactly. [00:53:26] Speaker B: Later on they're gonna do a two part adaptation of the novel the Earth Abides. It's too bad they didn't try that here. [00:53:32] Speaker A: And I think that the acting, which is rare for escape, is subpar in this. That also doesn't help. I don't. [00:53:40] Speaker B: The script gives them nothing. [00:53:42] Speaker A: That's a good point. [00:53:43] Speaker B: It's just expository dialogue. I will say I don't know who it is. Who played she. They got a woman with a sexy. [00:53:50] Speaker A: Voice, but she's boring. [00:53:52] Speaker B: Yeah, but if she pushed it any harder, it would be like over the top. [00:53:55] Speaker A: You know who should have been she? Old. Nancy. [00:54:00] Speaker B: Yes. 2,000 years. I be old today. [00:54:04] Speaker C: So beautiful. [00:54:09] Speaker A: Now we're on. Let's step through the flames. [00:54:11] Speaker D: You fast. Whoa. [00:54:14] Speaker E: Hot, Hot. [00:54:15] Speaker A: So hot. Tim, tell him stuff out in the world. Come find me. [00:54:24] Speaker E: No one else until you find me. [00:54:29] Speaker C: Please go visit. [00:54:30] Speaker B: Let me get this gauze off. [00:54:33] Speaker F: So much gauze. [00:54:35] Speaker A: This is slipping into a Monty Python sketch. [00:54:39] Speaker C: Please go visit ghoulishdelights.com you'll find other episodes there with this same quality commentary. You can also vote in polls, leave comments, let us know what you think about these episodes. You can also find our podcast. Wherever you get podcasts, but there's no polls there. People like polls. You can also. From there. You know what I never mentioned you can read our bios. You could find out a paragraph's worth of information about each of us. [00:55:06] Speaker B: If you're into a synopsis the way Eric is into a synopsis, then you should go and read our bios. [00:55:13] Speaker C: Sure thing. Tiny little history. And you can also find a link to our swag store and buy T shirts and cups for all your cup needs. And you can find a link to our Patreon page. [00:55:29] Speaker B: Yes. Go to patreon.com themorals and support this podcast, please. We do some of our best work behind a paywall, clearly. So, yeah. There are so many bonus podcasts to be had there. Zoom. Happy hours. Where we hang out and banter a lot like this only with our listeners. And it's a lot of fun. You can join our mysterious old book club. Perhaps now we will have to read she altogether. That would be a great fun. [00:56:04] Speaker A: No, you can. Oh, I won't. [00:56:08] Speaker B: This is so exciting. I love this. But I'm not gonna read it. [00:56:11] Speaker A: I'm not gonna read it. [00:56:12] Speaker B: I do have a synopsis to recommend to you though. Is the Lost World by Arthur Conan Doyle. It's this with dinosaurs. [00:56:19] Speaker A: I'm in. [00:56:20] Speaker B: And the lead professor is a much more interesting character. [00:56:24] Speaker A: All right. [00:56:25] Speaker B: Okay. Anyway, where was I? Yeah. Give us money. Thank you. [00:56:30] Speaker A: Hi. If you'd like to see the mysterious Old Radio Listening Society Theater company performing live. We do on stage recreations of classic old time radio shows and a lot of our own original work and scripts. Please come see us performing live. You can find out where we're performing and what we're performing and how to get tickets by going to ghoulishdelights.com we we perform a lot and we're somewhere almost all the time. So come see us. We'd love to see you if you're in the pretty much Minnesota. I mean, we do not have the ability to leave this state unless you give more money to Patreon. [00:57:04] Speaker B: Then we'll be in Wisconsin in October. [00:57:06] Speaker A: Oh, that's right. Granted, Wisconsin's an hour away. [00:57:09] Speaker B: Yes. And it's October 2025 and this may be the far flung future. Listen, AI may be listening to this. [00:57:17] Speaker A: At a certain level. We will come do live shows for you. We'll come to wherever you are, some Patreon. There's got to be a number, a Patreon level number where. [00:57:26] Speaker B: Yeah, we'll keep it vague like that. You tell us what that number is. [00:57:31] Speaker A: Right. We'll come and do shows. What's coming up next? [00:57:34] Speaker C: Coming up next is a series we've never listened to before. We had double feature, the Mystery of the Dog that Did and didn't and the Mystery of the Guest in room number two to two episodes of Dr. Tim Detective. [00:57:50] Speaker B: Oh, dear God. [00:57:50] Speaker C: Until then. [00:57:53] Speaker A: Where'D you get a penguin. [00:57:55] Speaker E: On top of your television? [00:57:57] Speaker A: Right. That's old Nancy slips into that. [00:58:03] Speaker B: Old Nancy as performed by Monty Py. Pretty much pretty good.