Episode Transcript
[00:00:17] Speaker A: The Mysterious Old Radio Listening Society Podcast.
[00:00:25] Speaker B: Look out.
[00:00:27] Speaker A: Welcome to the Mysterious Old Radio Listening Society, a podcast dedicated to suspense, crime and horror stories from the golden age of radio. I'm Eric.
[00:00:37] Speaker C: I'm Tim.
[00:00:37] Speaker D: And I'm Joshua.
[00:00:38] Speaker C: We love mysterious old time radio stories, but do they stand the test of time? That's what we're here to find out.
[00:00:43] Speaker A: In honor of the holiday season, I chose a festive episode of suspense entitled Back for Christmas.
[00:00:51] Speaker D: Suspense aired on CBS from 1942 to 1962, racking up 946 episodes in total, most of which still exist today. Suspense specialized in edge of your seat thrillers with a trademark twist at the end. Smart scripts and high production values attracted a bevy of a list Hollywood talent, including the star of today's production, Peter lorre.
[00:01:16] Speaker C: During the 1940s, Laurie starred in a string of film classics including the Maltese Falcon, Casablanca and Arsenic and Old Lace. Despite his success in mainstream film, Laurie continued to be typecast as a murderous maniac, likely due to his sinister performance in Fritz Lang's M and Karl Freund's Mad Love.
[00:01:33] Speaker A: His distinctive voice, with its ability to move instantly from tranquil whisper to baleful roar was perfectly suited for radio. In addition to frequent appearances on Suspense and Inner Sanctum, Laurie starred in the short lived horror anthology Mystery in the Air. Created for the sole purpose of showcasing Laurie's idiosyncratic voice, Back for Christmas was.
[00:01:57] Speaker D: Based on the 1939 John Collier short story of the same name. It was adapted for radio by Robert Tallman and performed multiple times over the course of suspense's 20 year run. The version you're about to hear was the first production. It was followed by two more. One in 1948 and another in 1956, both starring Herbert Marshall. The script was also reused by Escape in 1947 with Paul Fries in the lead role.
[00:02:25] Speaker C: And now let's listen to Back for Christmas from suspense. First broadcast December 23, 1943.
[00:02:32] Speaker A: It's late at night and a chill has set in. You're alone and the only light you see is coming from an antique radio. Listen to the sounds coming from the speakers. Listen to the music and listen to the voices.
[00:02:57] Speaker E: Suspense.
[00:03:06] Speaker F: Presented by Roma Wines made in California for enjoyment throughout the world.
[00:03:12] Speaker E: Salute.
[00:03:13] Speaker F: You're Eltinger. Roma toasts the world. The wine for your table is Roma made in California for enjoyment throughout the world.
[00:03:25] Speaker E: This is the man in black here for the Roma Wine Company of Fresno, California to introduce this weekly half hour of Suspense.
Tonight in Hollywood, Roma brings you as star Mr. Peter Laurie. The suspense play which stars Mr. Laurie and which is produced and directed by William Spear, is called Back for Christmas. In this series, Roemer brings you tales calculated to intrigue you, to stir your nerves, to offer you a precarious situation, and then withhold the solution until the last possible moment. And so, with Back for Christmas and with the performance of Peter Laurie, we again hope to keep you in suspense.
[00:04:20] Speaker G: Jingle bells, jingle bell Jingle all the way oh, what fun it is to ride your fun yes?
[00:04:34] Speaker B: Maria, what on earth are you doing down here in the cellar?
[00:04:36] Speaker G: Oh, yeah. Just doing a little digging.
[00:04:38] Speaker B: And why, may I ask, have you chosen this day of all days to dig up the cellar floor?
[00:04:44] Speaker G: I thought because the weather has been so damp, this would be a good time to plant that little devil's garden I told you about.
[00:04:52] Speaker B: Devil's garden? Whatever nonsense is that?
[00:04:55] Speaker G: Don't you remember? That was my little joke about it. You see, I've managed to get hold of the spores of several unclassified wild orchids. In our wild state, they bloom under damp masses of leaf mold. The South American Indians call them devil flowers because they appear to bloom underground.
[00:05:15] Speaker B: Well, I'm sure the South American Indians will be very interested. If you succeed in growing these ridiculous flowers under the cellar floor. Whom else it will interest, I can't imagine. Oh, what's that terrible smell?
[00:05:28] Speaker G: Oh, that's the lead mold. Chemically identical with the earth blanket they grow under in their wild state. And I want to get these started before we close the house.
[00:05:38] Speaker B: Do you realize that we're sailing for America a week from today, and you've made no arrangements whatever? Unless you call digging a hole in the cellar making arrangements. I certainly don't. Devil's Garden, indeed. Sometimes I think you're going soft in the head, Hubert.
[00:05:52] Speaker G: Oh, I suppose it is inconsiderate of me. You see, and I've been wanting to try this experiment for a long time. But with all those lectures and seminars at the university, there never seemed to be enough time.
[00:06:05] Speaker B: Well, there certainly isn't any.
I suppose you've forgotten I made an appointment for you at the barbers this afternoon.
[00:06:11] Speaker G: Must I shave my beard off? Remind.
[00:06:14] Speaker B: I thought we'd been through all that. Of course you must. They don't wear beards in America. Bad enough you're speaking with that accent. They'll probably think we're Germans as it is.
[00:06:23] Speaker G: Oh, I should think it would be quite easy just to explain that I'm Swiss.
[00:06:27] Speaker B: Now, Hubert, don't be argumentative. Go and get your jacket on. And do as I tell you.
[00:06:34] Speaker G: Yes, Hermione.
[00:06:34] Speaker B: And don't forget to take your umbrella. It looks like rain.
[00:06:37] Speaker G: Yes, Hermione.
[00:06:38] Speaker B: And don't look so put upon, Hubert. Someone has to plan things in this house. Never even get to the university in time for your lectures, much less make arrangements for a trip to America.
[00:06:48] Speaker G: I know, but what about my specimens?
[00:06:50] Speaker B: There'll be plenty of time to plant your precious Devil's garden when we get home from America. We're not going to be gone forever, you know. We'll be back here for Christmas.
[00:06:58] Speaker G: Yes, of course. Back for Christmas. I forgot.
[00:07:01] Speaker B: We'll try to remember it. And if you can't do that, just do as I tell you. I've been making the plans in this house for 20 years. And if there's any digging to be done, I'll manage that as well. Do you understand, Hubert?
[00:07:15] Speaker G: Yes, Hermione.
[00:07:16] Speaker B: Good. Now, you have just 20 minutes to clean up this mess down here. And keep your appointment at the bars. And when you finish there, I want you to come straight home.
[00:07:24] Speaker G: All right? Oh, I wanted to stop at Miss Markham's and pick up some books I ordered.
[00:07:30] Speaker B: Well, all right. But don't loiter there the whole afternoon moiling over those old books the way you usually do. Now, hurry and clear up this rubbish. Get rid of that smelly stuff. And no more digging, mind you.
[00:07:41] Speaker G: No more digging.
I'll show her. I'll have my Devil's garden if I. No more digging. Hey. No more digging.
[00:07:55] Speaker A: Oh.
[00:07:56] Speaker G: 15 men on a dead man's chest. You and a bottle. Gr.
[00:08:12] Speaker H: Good evening, sir.
[00:08:13] Speaker G: Good evening, Miss Morgan.
[00:08:15] Speaker H: Why, it is Professor Schumacher, isn't it?
[00:08:18] Speaker G: Do you like me better this way?
[00:08:19] Speaker H: You look ever so much younger without the beard. 20 years, at least.
[00:08:23] Speaker G: 20 years?
[00:08:24] Speaker H: Oh, you'll be glad to know those books you ordered have finally arrived.
[00:08:27] Speaker G: Oh, yes, the books.
[00:08:29] Speaker H: Let me see. The. The Phytotomy of Phalloid Gametophytes and Coniferous Shrubs of North America. Those are the ones you ordered, aren't they?
[00:08:36] Speaker G: Yes, thank you. You're very kind, Markham.
[00:08:39] Speaker H: Why kind, Professor Schumacher?
[00:08:41] Speaker G: Well, not. Not many young ladies in bookshelves would go out of their way to look up rare books for an old professor of botany.
[00:08:48] Speaker H: Why, you're not old, Professor Schumacher. Really, you look.
[00:08:51] Speaker G: What do I look like?
[00:08:53] Speaker H: And besides, I adore botany. It's my particular hobby.
[00:08:56] Speaker G: Oh, really? You've never told me that before, Miss Markham.
[00:09:00] Speaker H: Well, I was afraid to. You looked so imposing with the beard and all.
[00:09:05] Speaker G: Miss Markham, forgive me if this sounds foolish, but since Talking with you today, I feel that shaving off my beard is the most important thing I've done for 20 years.
[00:09:17] Speaker H: Oh, it is. I'm sure it is.
[00:09:19] Speaker G: For 20.
[00:09:21] Speaker H: I'm so sorry that I've been so distant with you all this time. Oh, there were times when I almost spoke up.
[00:09:26] Speaker G: Oh, really?
[00:09:27] Speaker H: Times when you came in here tired after a day with your students at the university.
You seem so alone. The way I'm alone in the world.
[00:09:35] Speaker G: Alone.
[00:09:36] Speaker H: I'd like to have asked you to stay awhile and talk with me. But some way or other, I. I always wound up giving you your change and letting you go on your way.
[00:09:44] Speaker G: Say, you.
[00:09:45] Speaker H: You're alone in the world since my father died.
[00:09:48] Speaker G: Oh, miss. Miss Markham, did. Did you never think of marrying?
[00:09:52] Speaker H: My father was a very remarkable man. I never found anyone who seemed to measure up to what he led me to expect of men.
[00:10:00] Speaker G: Miss Markham.
[00:10:02] Speaker H: It's been so long since anyone called me by my first name. I'd like you to, if you want to. It's Marian.
[00:10:07] Speaker G: Marian. Oh, how nice.
[00:10:10] Speaker H: And yours?
[00:10:11] Speaker G: Well, Hubertus, but in English. Hubert sounds better.
[00:10:16] Speaker H: How long have you been alone, Hubert?
[00:10:18] Speaker G: Alone?
[00:10:18] Speaker H: I knew you were a widower. Of course, I. The first time I saw you a widower. I can always tell this. A certain sadness in a man's eyes. A sweet sadness, I think, when he's been married and then lost.
[00:10:29] Speaker G: Oh, I do.
I never thought of it in quite that way.
[00:10:33] Speaker H: Oh, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have been talking like this, I suppose. But I've often wondered what she must have been like. Your wife, I mean.
[00:10:41] Speaker G: Hermione.
Not an easy woman to forget. Very strong. Always managing things. The house, my wardrobe, my friends. Even when we dined at a restaurant, she even then ordered my food. She was always managing things her whole life. Managed herself to death.
[00:11:05] Speaker H: Poor woman. She must have loved you very much. But she needn't have put herself out. So it's plain to see you don't need things managed for you. No, you need companionship, I think. Someone sympathetic with your work. But the last thing on earth you need is a manager.
[00:11:20] Speaker G: How well you put it. The last thing on earth.
[00:11:31] Speaker B: Operator? Operator, are you there? I'm still waiting on that call to Salisbury. Well, put them on quickly.
Hello? Is this Paul holton's sons? It's Mrs. Hubert Schumacher. Did you receive my letter? Good. Now, remember, we'll be back for Christmas, and I want the job done without fail.
What's that?
No, I'm sure he doesn't suspect anything.
Send it to me in New York, as I instructed you. Addressed in my name, of course.
Yes, I've already put them in the mail. You'll get them tomorrow. Thank you. Thank you so much.
Oh, here you are, Hubert. Where have you been?
[00:12:13] Speaker G: Oh, backstairs. I dismissed the servants.
[00:12:17] Speaker B: Dismissed the servants?
[00:12:19] Speaker G: Mm.
[00:12:20] Speaker B: But I've asked some friends of mine into a farewell luncheon. Go and tell them it's a mistake.
[00:12:24] Speaker G: Well, I'm afraid it's too late now. They've packed and gone.
[00:12:29] Speaker B: You have messed things up properly. How many times have I told you to leave things to me? I make the plans around here.
[00:12:35] Speaker G: Yes. You're mining.
[00:12:37] Speaker B: You have to do better than this when I plan the trip home, or we'll never in the world be back for Christmas.
[00:12:41] Speaker G: Back for Christmas? Back for Christmas? Must you keep saying that?
[00:12:46] Speaker B: Why not?
We are coming back for Christmas, aren't we?
[00:12:50] Speaker G: Supposing I were offered a professorship in one of those wealthy American universities.
[00:12:55] Speaker B: Nonsense. Americans care nothing for botany.
[00:12:57] Speaker G: Well, Luther Burbank was an American, wasn't he?
[00:12:59] Speaker B: Yeah. It's different. What have you ever done except muck around in the dirt with a lot of roots and tubers?
[00:13:04] Speaker G: Well, they asked me to lecture, didn't they?
[00:13:07] Speaker B: All right, all right. Now, there's no use getting yourself in a state about this, Hubert. No doubt this extra money will come in very handy when we arrive back. Back for Christmas? I know. Precisely. No good to make a joke of it. Heaven knows where you'd be today if I hadn't got a sense of time.
[00:13:24] Speaker G: Yes, Hermione.
[00:13:25] Speaker B: And as you've been so foolish as to dismiss the servants, you may empty the ashtrays and straighten up this room while we're waiting for the guest to arrive. I'm going to have my bath. Call me when they get here.
[00:13:43] Speaker G: Marion, it's Hubert.
No, no, darling. No, nothing is wrong. Oh, my plans are the same. Unless. Unless you have changed. No. We'll meet in New York then, and be married there. I'll explain to you why later. You just have to trust me. Yes.
Yes, madame. Hubert, I'm so sorry. I can't talk any longer. Yes, I'll meet you in New York without fail. I'll feel the same man.
[00:14:11] Speaker B: Liebe, were you talking on the phone just now?
[00:14:16] Speaker G: Yes. Yes, Hermione.
[00:14:18] Speaker B: Whoever was it?
[00:14:19] Speaker G: Oh, Freddie. Freddy Sinker.
[00:14:22] Speaker B: But didn't I hear you say something about meeting somebody in New York?
[00:14:26] Speaker G: Why, yes.
Freddy said he might possibly get over there before we even leave. And I said of course we'd meet him there if he that seems very peculiar.
[00:14:36] Speaker B: But then all of your friends are peculiar. Yes, Hermione, and just look at your jacket. Have you been digging in that cellar again?
[00:14:43] Speaker G: Yes, Hermione.
[00:14:44] Speaker B: Well, there's no need for it. You can't possibly get that Devil's Garden thing finished before we sail for America. Go and change your clothes before the guests arrive. Oh, never mind. I see somebody coming up the walk now. Go and let them in.
[00:14:57] Speaker G: Yes, Hubert. Yes.
[00:15:00] Speaker B: Look out the window. There's professor and Mrs. Goodenough. But who's that with them precisely? Freddy Sinclair. Peculiar? You should have been talking to him on the phone not three minutes ago. And now here he is.
[00:15:15] Speaker G: Yes, isn't it?
But then, as you see, Hermione, all of my friends are peculiar.
[00:15:21] Speaker B: Not half so peculiar as you digging in the cellar the very day we leave for America. Just look at yourself.
And now that I think of it.
[00:15:32] Speaker G: Yes.
[00:15:33] Speaker B: Oh, never mind. Go and let them in.
[00:15:35] Speaker G: Oh, you were going to ask me something, Hermione, about the hole I'm digging in a cellar.
[00:15:40] Speaker B: Good heavens. Stop rolling your eyes about that way. One would think you were digging a grave down there instead of a storage bin.
[00:15:47] Speaker G: Yes, Hermione.
[00:15:49] Speaker B: What's that?
[00:15:50] Speaker G: I said, yes, Hermione.
[00:15:52] Speaker B: Father opened the door and. Please stop saying yes, Hermione.
[00:15:56] Speaker G: I think, my dear, I have said it for the last time.
[00:16:08] Speaker E: A professor of botany, his loving wife and an oblong pit in the cellar just the right size for his botanical specimens. His Devil's Garden. With these ingredients for a story of a perfect crime. Back for Christmas, by John Collier and starring Peter Laurie, the Roma Wine Company closes the curtain for a moment on another breathless study in suspense.
[00:16:43] Speaker F: In this brief intermission in the play, it's pleasant to think about the holidays. Not everyone celebrates the holidays against a background of snow and pine trees. Somewhere south of the Gulf in the Caribbean, in a gracious home surrounded by palm trees and the warm sun you might find holiday dinners ending this way.
[00:17:04] Speaker E: One moment, please.
Our North American guest wishes to propose a toast. Yes, mis amigos. I drink a toast in gratitude to you for your gracious hospitality and the enjoyment you've given me. An American so far from home. It is only a fair exchange, my friend. This wine in which you drink your toast, it brings enjoyment to us. From your country? From America. It is Roma wine. Made in your own California.
[00:17:36] Speaker F: Yes. And when you choose the wine for your holiday table, remember this, only a few wines are so fine that many countries of the world import them. And among these greatly enjoyable wines are the wines of Roma R O M A made in California for enjoyment throughout the world. Yet here in America, we are truly fortunate for we may buy Roma wines at a very low cost since we don't have to pay import duty or costly shipping charges. So serve Roma wine with pride on any and all holiday occasions. Serve Roma II for everyday dinners. You can afford to ask your dealer tomorrow for your favorite Roma wine, America's largest selling wine. But before you buy wine, buy war bonds.
[00:18:27] Speaker E: And now, it is with pleasure that we bring back to our soundstage Mr. Peter Laurie in Act 2 of Back for Christmas. A tale well calculated to keep you in suspend.
[00:18:50] Speaker G: Back for Christmas. Hermione was so positive we would be back for Christmas. That last afternoon, pouring tea out for a few friends who had come in to see her last minute farewells, she kept reiterating it.
[00:19:05] Speaker B: Now mind you, Hermione, don't let those Americans lure your husband with one of their fat university jobs. We absolutely, they must have you with us for Christmas. He shall be back, I promise you.
[00:19:16] Speaker G: Well, it's not absolutely certain, of course, Hubert.
[00:19:18] Speaker B: What do you mean, it's not certain? Of course it's certain.
[00:19:21] Speaker E: After all, Hubert's old boy. You've contracted to lecture for only three months.
[00:19:25] Speaker G: Oh, that's quite right. But then, of course, anything may happen.
[00:19:28] Speaker B: Cupid adores being unpredictable. Now, what other man would decide the day? The very day, mind you, before leaving for America, to dig a great hole in the floor of the cellar. In the cellar? Yes. He's going to put some unclassified wild orchids down there. A devil's garden, if you please. It sounds so mysterious. That's Hubert. Though it's really quite simple. However, once you find out what he's up to. Now, take the telephone call he put through to you a few minutes ago, Freddy.
[00:19:59] Speaker E: To me?
[00:20:00] Speaker B: Of course. Now, Hubert wanted to surprise me about your plan to meet us in New York next month. Wasn't that why he called? To ask you not to mention it?
[00:20:08] Speaker E: My dear, my own Hubert couldn't possibly.
[00:20:10] Speaker F: Have telephoned me within the past hour.
[00:20:12] Speaker E: I've been walking in the park since 3.
[00:20:15] Speaker B: He didn't telephone you?
[00:20:16] Speaker E: Well, how could he? It is for my going to America.
[00:20:19] Speaker G: No, no, no, no, no. Come, Freddy, come. You may as well confess. Hermione has just found me out again.
[00:20:25] Speaker E: But Hubert's old chap. I really.
[00:20:27] Speaker B: Do you see what a poor liar Hubert makes? He's red as a beetroot. Aren't you ashamed of yourself, Professor? Stringing poor Hermione along like that? And as for you, Freddy, I'm furious. You said nothing to us about going to America.
[00:20:40] Speaker F: Look here, old girl.
[00:20:41] Speaker E: I've been trying to tell everyone here.
[00:20:43] Speaker B: That I'm stuff and nonsense. The game's gone on long enough. Besides, we must start getting ready now. It was marvelous of all of you to come in to say goodbye. And don't worry about Hubert's little jokes. I will bring him back for Christmas. You may rely on it.
[00:21:01] Speaker G: He all believed her. For years she had been promising me for dinner parties, garden parties, committees. And the promises had always been kept. This time they would not be. I had seen to that. The servants were gone for good. The farewells all said I had time to the minute how long it would take to fill in a hole in a cellar. My devil's garden.
Upstairs in her bedroom, I undressed and put on my old bathrobe. And then I opened the door into Hermione's room. Oh, Hermione, have you a moment to spare?
[00:21:42] Speaker B: Of course, dear. I'm just finished.
[00:21:43] Speaker G: Oh, then will you come in here for a moment, please? There's something rather extraordinary here.
[00:21:48] Speaker B: Oh, good heavens, Hubert. What are you lounging about in that filthy old bathroom for? I told you to put it into the furnace.
[00:21:54] Speaker G: I'll do it. I'll do it today. Yes, really, I will.
[00:21:57] Speaker B: Well, high time. Now, what is it you want to show me?
[00:22:00] Speaker G: Oh, here. Here in the bathroom. Just look. Who in the world do you suppose dropped a gold chain down the bathtub drain?
[00:22:07] Speaker B: Nobody has. Of course, nobody wears such a thing.
[00:22:10] Speaker G: Then what is it doing in here?
[00:22:12] Speaker B: I don't see anything.
[00:22:13] Speaker G: Well, look, I'll hold this flashlight here for you. If you lean right over, you can see it shining. It's deep down.
[00:22:20] Speaker B: Oh, such a lot of nonsense. Just as well I don't see it, Hubert.
[00:22:23] Speaker G: Go on looking, Hermione. Just a moment, Hubert.
[00:22:27] Speaker B: I absolutely refuse. Hubert, what are you doing? Take your hands off my neck.
[00:22:32] Speaker G: I will, Hermione. Just as soon as I finish the arrangements for my trip to America.
[00:22:38] Speaker B: What are you talking about?
[00:22:39] Speaker G: You thought you were the only one who could plan things, didn't you? Didn't you, Hermione? Huh? Well, I've been making some plans of my own this past week. In exactly 2 minutes and 16 seconds, you'll be dead. You see? You see? I planned it very accurately.
[00:23:02] Speaker B: You'll never get away with it.
[00:23:04] Speaker G: Oh, I thought you would see that, Hermione. But I will get away with it. You won't mind the smell of to leave mo down in the cellar when I take you down there. Today?
Yes. That is where you are growing, Hermione. Right into my devil's garden. That annoys you so much, my friend.
[00:23:26] Speaker B: Don't expect me back for Christma.
[00:23:28] Speaker G: They do.
[00:23:28] Speaker B: If they don't hear from me, they'll start asking questions.
[00:23:31] Speaker G: No, they won't. Because you'll write them letters, Hermione, on the typewriter, as you always do. They'll be signed H. In that neat, correcting way you always sign your notes to your friends.
[00:23:47] Speaker B: Here, let me up now. No, it won't work. Hubert. You were never any good at planning.
[00:23:53] Speaker G: Oh, but I have changed. I've learned from watching you all these years.
[00:23:59] Speaker B: The lecture people in America, they'll expect you to be traveling with your wife.
[00:24:03] Speaker G: I will be traveling with my wife, but not my present wife, Hermione.
[00:24:08] Speaker B: Hubert. It won't work, I tell you. That pit you dug in the cellar.
[00:24:13] Speaker G: Oh, it will work. It'll serve its purpose. Well.
[00:24:17] Speaker B: Hubert.
[00:24:18] Speaker G: No, no, I'm sorry, dear. This thing has to be done exactly as planned. You have just five seconds to say your prayers.
[00:24:29] Speaker B: Hubert, you must listen. The cellar.
Don't do it, Hubert.
[00:24:34] Speaker D: Hubert.
[00:24:35] Speaker B: Yes?
[00:24:51] Speaker G: Oh, steward.
[00:24:52] Speaker B: Yes, sir?
[00:24:53] Speaker G: Oh, my wife. She's in this post. She'll be taking her meals in our stateroom.
[00:24:57] Speaker E: For the whole voyage, sir?
[00:24:59] Speaker G: Yes, for the whole voyage.
[00:25:04] Speaker B: I trust your wife is feeling better this morning, Professor Schumacher?
[00:25:08] Speaker E: A little.
[00:25:09] Speaker G: Not yet. Well enough to leave a cabin.
[00:25:11] Speaker B: Oh, what a shame.
[00:25:12] Speaker G: Oh, Professor Schumacher. Yes?
[00:25:14] Speaker E: Here's a copy of the radiogram you sent for your wife last evening.
[00:25:17] Speaker G: Thank you. I'll just check it over. Oh, but. But look. Look here.
[00:25:23] Speaker E: Why, what's the matter? Did the typist make a mistake?
[00:25:26] Speaker G: No, no, it's nothing important. She can correct it later.
For a moment, I had a feeling that Hermione had been leaning over my shoulder again. Correcting what I had written, as she always did. I had written a radiogram to Professor Goodenough and his wife.
Haven't been out of my cabin the whole beastly trip, Hubert. Well, now, Doubt will be back for Christmas. But the operator had left out the W, and it read, no doubt we'll be back for Christmas.
Exactly what Hermione would have written.
Well, the rest of the trip was uneventful. Marian and I met in New York, just as we had planned. Just as we had planned.
Professor and Mrs. Schumacher. We have reservations, I believe.
[00:26:44] Speaker E: Oh, yes.
[00:26:44] Speaker F: We've been expecting you, sir.
[00:26:46] Speaker E: Boy, take professor and Mrs. Schumacher's luggage up to their suite. You know, Mrs. Schumacher, you're quite a surprise. Your letter reserving the rooms was so.
[00:26:53] Speaker F: Thorough, I was expecting an older, more.
[00:26:56] Speaker E: Forbidding sort of person.
[00:26:57] Speaker H: Frankly, ma'am, no. As a matter of fact, we're just married. But I. My letter is serving the rooms.
[00:27:03] Speaker G: Oh, I wrote the letter, my dear. And I signed it Mrs. Hubert Schumacher. Just a joke.
[00:27:09] Speaker H: What a cunning old fox you are, Hubert.
[00:27:11] Speaker G: Now that I think of it.
[00:27:13] Speaker E: Oh, I almost forgot. There's a letter for you, Mrs. Schumacher.
[00:27:17] Speaker H: That's peculiar. I wonder who on.
[00:27:19] Speaker G: Oh, well, we'll find out in good time. Come along, darling. We are keeping the boy waiting.
Oh, wow.
Nothing like a cold, brisk shower to put a man to write.
[00:27:39] Speaker H: Hubert, this letter.
[00:27:40] Speaker G: Oh, yes, the letter. Oh, dry my hair, will you, darling, please?
[00:27:43] Speaker H: It seems to be a bill of some sort from a building contractor in Salisbury.
[00:27:47] Speaker G: Oh, really?
[00:27:48] Speaker H: Oh, bother. Dry your own hair.
[00:27:50] Speaker G: Thank you, darling. Let's see this bill, or whatever it is.
[00:27:54] Speaker H: It's very puzzling.
Hubert.
You were a widower, weren't you? I mean, Hermione isn't still alive?
[00:28:02] Speaker G: Good heavens, no. Well, let me read that.
Mm.
Dear Madame, this is to acknowledge your order together with the keys to your house in Launceston Place. How a man had no difficulty in finding the place where your husband had begun the excavation in the cellar. But apparently he changed his mind at the last moment and filled it in again.
[00:28:28] Speaker H: What is it, Hubert?
[00:28:29] Speaker G: Our men will begin digging tomorrow, and the job will be completed in ample time for your surprise Christmas present to your husband. We are happy to be conspirators with you in this thoughtful gesture and hope that Professor Schumacher will be pleased at the results of our work. Honey, is Devil's Garden Very truly yours, Paul Hold Sons Contractors.
[00:29:02] Speaker H: What does it mean, Hubert?
[00:29:04] Speaker G: It means.
Means that Hermione was right.
I will be back for Christmas I will be back for Christmas I will.
[00:29:19] Speaker B: Back for Christmas Back for Christmas Yes.
[00:29:41] Speaker E: And so closes Back for Christmas, starring Mr. Peter Laurie. Tonight's tale of suspense.
[00:29:53] Speaker F: In just a moment, we shall hear again from Mr. Laurie. But first, just a word that seems appropriate. One of the world's oldest customs is the Christmas toast. And traditionally, down through centuries of war and peace, the Christmas toast has been drunk in wine.
This year, when the glasses are filled and raised once again, we know that in every home, the toast will be to a speedy victory and a speedy return of those we love. And before we set the wine glasses down, let us all resolve to do everything within our power to help make that toast come true. Let us resolve to help supply the weapons of war by buying even more and more war bonds. Let us resolve to face our own inconveniences without complaining. And above all, let us resolve that when this war is at last over, each of us will exert all our effort to see that future Christmases truly express peace on earth, goodwill to men.
This thought, together with our very best wishes of the season, is the Roma Wine Company's Christmas message for you, its friends here in America and throughout the world.
[00:31:01] Speaker G: This is Peter Laurie. Thank you for listening to our suspense play this evening, and I know you're looking forward to next week's show, as I am. It is called Finishing School and its subtitle might be the famous quotation, the female of the species is more deadly than the male.
[00:31:21] Speaker E: Don't forget then next Thursday, same time for Margot Elsa Lanchester, Janet Beecher, and a distinguished all feminine cast.
[00:31:30] Speaker F: In suspense presented by Roma Wines R O M A made in California for enjoyment throughout the world.
This is the Columbia Broadcasting System.
[00:31:55] Speaker A: That was back for Christmas from suspense here on the mysterious old radio listening society podcast once again. I'm Eric.
[00:32:03] Speaker C: I'm Tim.
[00:32:03] Speaker D: And I'm Joshua.
[00:32:05] Speaker A: That was my pick. It's become quasi traditional that Joshua is nice enough every year to say, hey, you should pick a Christmas episode for us. Tim's tradition is to pick an episode of Signalman for Christmas, and he does that every year. And I am astonished that we never run out.
[00:32:26] Speaker C: Astonished is a nice word.
[00:32:28] Speaker A: Someday I would assume we would hit all of them. Joshua and Tim know my love of Christmas. I adore it. And I really like to delve into movies and other entertainment sources that are all about Christmas. And so to pick one every year is fun. I struggle because old time radio has a tendency to soften everything when it comes to the Christmas episodes. You know, like, it gets really goofy, like a Sherlock Holmes. Christmas thing is just like who stole the ham? Like, it just becomes who stole the ham? Yeah, that's.
[00:33:07] Speaker D: That's very serious, Eric.
[00:33:09] Speaker A: Very serious. So it's been a lot of hit and miss over the last few years. So the first question I have, and this is a very Eric thing, as a third person myself, to ask, we have done this episode before, one of the other ones, right?
[00:33:21] Speaker D: Nope.
[00:33:22] Speaker A: Nope, we have not. So we didn't do this story by Collier. We have not had on the podcast.
[00:33:27] Speaker D: No, we've done other stories by John Collier.
[00:33:29] Speaker A: Why is this so familiar to me?
[00:33:31] Speaker D: I'm gonna go on a limb and say you've just heard it before.
[00:33:33] Speaker C: Maybe I've heard it before.
[00:33:35] Speaker A: Okay. So when I was listening to this, I thought, either A, I've heard it before, or B, we've had it on the podcast, but I don't care. I mean, another version of it.
[00:33:42] Speaker C: You probably in the past done some Hunt for Christmas episodes.
[00:33:45] Speaker A: Right. The reason that I said I don't care if we've done this one before. This story, I should say, is because of Laurie. That's why I brought it to the table. I was infatuated with Laurie. Well, we always are with this performance, but this one in particular was amazing for me. I was like, wow, you are so Peter Laurie.
There's so much Peter Laurie.
[00:34:15] Speaker D: The only thing better than Peter Lorre. Lorre singing Jingle Bells is Peter Laurie singing a sea shanty.
[00:34:22] Speaker A: Yep.
[00:34:22] Speaker D: While digging a devil's garden.
[00:34:24] Speaker A: Right, Right. The opening of this with the Christmas carol and him singing the Christmas Jingle bells. Jingle Bell was just fantastic. There is some story out there that we've done in this podcast that this is similar to, and it's gonna drive me crazy. Anyway, none of this was brought to the table for any other reason than, A, it had a Christmas thing going on and I need to do that, but B, it wasn't for this great story.
I think his story's fine. It's all about Peter Laurie. Discuss.
[00:34:56] Speaker C: Yeah, I think that Peter Laurie is the whole thing of it.
[00:35:02] Speaker A: Yep.
[00:35:02] Speaker C: As well as the celebration of traditional Christmas elements of murdering your wife and marrying that nice lady at the library.
[00:35:11] Speaker D: Who just likes old men who have.
[00:35:13] Speaker C: Recently shaved because her father spoiled her for me.
[00:35:20] Speaker D: Okay. I do have to step in, though, and revert to form and defend John Cully. The story it's based on, it is a killer lean, very well managed, to use a Hermione term, five and a half page short story.
[00:35:38] Speaker C: Wow.
[00:35:39] Speaker F: Wow.
[00:35:39] Speaker D: And it works so well. And the problem, I think, with the script is in order to expand it to 30 minutes, it undermines the twist ending because it's not a big enough twist for 30 minutes.
[00:35:55] Speaker A: Right. You see it coming too soon in.
[00:35:58] Speaker D: The length of five pages. It's a delicious little piece of irony waiting for it for 30 minutes. And it really foreshadows it over and over again. I mean, literally, Hermione is trying to tell you the twist while being strangled. She's like, before you bury me, you should know.
[00:36:15] Speaker A: Right.
[00:36:17] Speaker C: My body will be discovered.
[00:36:18] Speaker A: Oh, yeah.
[00:36:19] Speaker C: You'll figure it out.
[00:36:25] Speaker A: Yeah. It's interesting that she knows she's going to be killed and is trying to.
[00:36:30] Speaker C: Help fix his plan.
[00:36:31] Speaker A: Fix his plan. Right.
[00:36:33] Speaker C: Oh, you're terrible at this. I'll just do it myself.
[00:36:42] Speaker D: I really like the addition of the Devil's Garden in the short story. He's just digging an underground storage area for his wine barrels or something like that for his comic books.
But I love the idea of the flowers that bloom under the wet molding leaves so that it appears as if they are blooming under the earth. And it's nice. And it foreshadows obviously that his plans do not come to fruition.
Some writer had just read Robert Tallman, whoever adapted it had just read about that somewhere and went, ooh, right, I can use that here.
[00:37:22] Speaker C: Do love in this sort of bad heist structure of I've got this plan, it's foolproof, and these little step by step things of where it goes wrong, just watching the certainty crumble is what's fun about it.
[00:37:38] Speaker A: There was a lot of bad planning, though. Even without the seller being dug up.
[00:37:44] Speaker C: Yes.
[00:37:45] Speaker A: Eventually she was going to discover that his wife was alive. Up until. Right up until he hit New York, the plan was bad. And I think the irony of that is that's what she was telling him the whole time is you're bad at planning things. And this was a bad plan. Regardless of her being dug up. It was a bad plan.
[00:38:04] Speaker C: He was hoping that. Because he kept trying to say, I don't know if it was just an excuse of like, maybe I'll get picked up for some lecture thing. Maybe we'll stay out here indefinitely. You can't see me, but I'm shrugging my shoulders.
[00:38:17] Speaker D: I think the idea holds that these people they were friends with seem to be shallow social acquaintances that they go to dinner with and that eventually, if they're gone for more than a year and they've written a. He's written a few letters as if he's Hermione and the letters just stop, that someone isn't going to get on a boat and come look for them in what happens to the house.
[00:38:41] Speaker A: He just keeps paying the mortgage and no one ever moves in.
[00:38:45] Speaker D: Now I'm blurring the script and the actual story so I can't remember if it's in this radio version or in the story. He just talks about that he'll eventually come back years later and sell it.
[00:38:57] Speaker A: And no one will know there's a plan. Thank you. Thank you for putting.
[00:39:01] Speaker D: No, but I agree with you that again, this attempts to take a very simple story and expand it and it gets a little tangled up in its expansion. Right.
[00:39:12] Speaker A: It doesn't matter though, because listening to Laurie read the letter at the end.
[00:39:20] Speaker D: He seems to sense like this Twist isn't big enough, Right.
I'm going to make it big enough.
[00:39:28] Speaker A: Oh, God. It just builds and builds. Oh, no. Oh, no.
[00:39:34] Speaker C: I think he was in the studio and then just walks out the door of the studio into the hallway of the building where it's being recorded out in the street, just yelling as he goes.
[00:39:43] Speaker A: And he still sounds like he's on mic.
[00:39:47] Speaker D: Can you go a little Farther off, Mike? Mr. Lorre?
[00:39:52] Speaker A: Yeah. You said it in the opening. You wrote Joshua about his ability to move from the tranquil whisper to the baleful roar. It's on a dime, you know, like he just got the ladder.
[00:40:07] Speaker D: Oh, no.
[00:40:09] Speaker A: It's amazing the choice as an actor to make that choice. You would build and he frequently doesn't build.
[00:40:16] Speaker D: It's not just volume though, because it's also in like mental derangement from zero to tan.
[00:40:23] Speaker A: Right. We all would air on the side, performance wise, to let it sink in, let it build, realize there are no options, get more and more panicky. It's like Lori decides his character went A + B equals C instantly. It makes him super interesting.
[00:40:42] Speaker C: Yeah, it's that alchemy of I can infuse some heightened emotion with menace.
[00:40:46] Speaker A: Yeah. Interesting piece in there of dialogue where she says they're probably going to think we're, you know, German because of our accents.
[00:40:56] Speaker D: Total Peter Laurie joke.
But.
[00:40:59] Speaker A: And she has zero accent at all. Like they're not playing her with an accent.
[00:41:04] Speaker D: Yeah. And he's like, I'm Swiss.
It's a grading one note stereotype, Hermione. But. But I love the performance though, because it just. It is on the mark. Yeah, it is. That stereotype turned up to 200 and I think I read somewhere she's not credited, but many old time radio aficionados believe that's Jeanette Nolan.
[00:41:32] Speaker F: Oh.
[00:41:33] Speaker D: But she did a lot of early uncredited suspense roles and this is only suspense's second year, 1943.
[00:41:40] Speaker A: So weird to be uncredited as a co star of a show. Yeah, that's a two person vehicle.
[00:41:46] Speaker D: And yeah, it obviously happened more often to the women.
[00:41:50] Speaker A: Sure. Still weird.
[00:41:52] Speaker D: I still find it strange that they redid this episode so many times. It's not that great of a standalone script. I agree with you totally, Eric, that it is powered by Peter Laurie's performance. That is the appeal and the fun of it. And without that, I've heard the other suspense one and the Paul Herbert Marshall. Herbert Marshall, Yeah. I find that really blase. And even the Paul Fries one is creepier because he plays it straighter.
[00:42:20] Speaker C: The Guy who's handed the script, like, okay, okay. And Peter Laurie did this before. Like, oh, come on.
[00:42:27] Speaker A: Well, what are you gonna do?
[00:42:29] Speaker D: Not yell, grow a beard.
[00:42:32] Speaker A: And then shave it on the air for real.
[00:42:37] Speaker D: It just does a lot of unnecessary things. It has the promising commercial cliffhanger of him lying to Hermione that he was just on the phone with his friend Freddie. And then Freddie shows up at the door. Then we go to the commercial, and then it's just swept away instantly, without much complication.
[00:42:57] Speaker C: He scrutinized and then.
[00:42:58] Speaker A: Ha.
[00:42:58] Speaker C: You're lying. You were on the phone with him.
[00:43:02] Speaker G: What?
[00:43:02] Speaker A: Yeah. I will say that I agree with you that I wanted more of him being caught.
[00:43:09] Speaker D: Yeah. It's just padding. And not very good padding. Right?
[00:43:12] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:43:13] Speaker A: But it had potential to be good padding. Yes.
[00:43:15] Speaker D: It also has a weird half adaptation issue where in the script he says, oh, there's a gold necklace down the bathtub drain. Right. To get her to look down there.
[00:43:26] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:43:26] Speaker D: And that's straight from the story. But in the story. Well, this is the great thing about the story. This is a page and a half in. There's been no buildup or you don't get led into his thoughts. And then he beats her brains in with a lead pipe when she bends down and looks in the tub so that the tub can catch all the blood.
[00:43:43] Speaker C: Oh.
[00:43:45] Speaker D: And it's brutal. And it comes out of nowhere, and you almost drop the book. Oh, and here it's just so I can strangle you. It would actually be more awkward to try to strangle someone and then they have a whole conversation while she's being strangled.
[00:43:58] Speaker A: That's the other hard part of this, is. Look down there. Okay, now that I got you looked down, let me take 10 minutes to explain to you my entire plan. Just if you're gonna do.
[00:44:09] Speaker C: I think he's making such a point of. I have this time. Meticulous. I know exactly how long it takes to bury you.
[00:44:13] Speaker A: Right. Right.
[00:44:14] Speaker C: Two and a half minutes to choke the life out of you. So move it.
[00:44:18] Speaker B: Right.
[00:44:19] Speaker A: Just look down there. Bam. Okay, that's done. And not to be like, here's my pointers on murdering your wife, but clearly you're terrible at. Right.
It was too much exposition for the sake of the listener.
[00:44:33] Speaker D: We already knew it.
[00:44:34] Speaker A: And it's stuff we already knew, and.
[00:44:36] Speaker D: There was no reason that she needs to know it because she's about to die.
[00:44:40] Speaker A: Correct. It's all so that she can give him the warning he doesn't listen to. I think you could have done that quicker. Look down there now. I'm going to kill you.
[00:44:52] Speaker D: Or she doesn't have to give him the warning.
[00:44:54] Speaker A: Right, Right. There doesn't need to be the warning that he just gets the letter.
[00:44:59] Speaker C: Just let him rant for the developed time. I'm killing you. I'm killing you. Look at me.
That's my Peter Laurie impersonation.
[00:45:09] Speaker D: Yeah. And obviously the story.
[00:45:11] Speaker A: Only one in the world that can't do a Peter Laurie impression.
[00:45:15] Speaker D: Obviously, the story is darker and more violent than probably they were comfortable with on radio in this era.
[00:45:23] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:45:23] Speaker D: Because he ends up in the story. He cuts her into little pieces and parcels and buries them all downstairs and cleans out the bathtub with the blood. And someone does show up at the door while he's in the middle of that. And he's down in the basement naked, covered in blood and coals.
He's like frozen down there. And so obviously, as much as I'd like to see Peter Laurie wouldn't really translate to radio.
[00:45:46] Speaker A: Who did Snowman killing?
[00:45:47] Speaker D: That was fear and 4.
[00:45:48] Speaker A: Fear and 4. So fear on 4 could get away with a true adaptation of this, Right? I'd like to hear it.
[00:45:54] Speaker D: I think it's a slight story meant to be very short and probably best served on the page. So it might have just been a bad decision to adapt it at all.
[00:46:03] Speaker A: I would like to hear an eight minute version of it.
[00:46:06] Speaker D: It would be fun to just do a speed version.
[00:46:08] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[00:46:10] Speaker C: I mean, I know technically he's in trouble at the very end, but I'm also thinking, like, you're out of the country. You're about as good a position as you can be for just getting caught having murdered your wife.
[00:46:21] Speaker D: Yeah. Grow your beard back.
Instant disguise.
[00:46:26] Speaker A: But he'll lose his 20 year old girlfriend. True wife. Girlfriend. Wife.
[00:46:31] Speaker D: Oh, there's also the great moment at the concierge desk when they get to New York and the guy is like, your letter was so commanding and thorough. I was expecting an older, more formidable woman.
Competent equals old hag, apparently. 1943.
[00:46:48] Speaker A: What a weird thing to comment on. You don't match your writing skill.
[00:46:53] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:46:54] Speaker C: And also the smooth cover of, oh, I wrote to you pretending to be my wife.
[00:46:59] Speaker G: Why?
[00:47:01] Speaker A: We have experienced that with this podcast. That weird moment where people see our faces and go, oh, I had the voices wrong.
Like, you look like you would be that guy. And I'm always freaked out by that. Like, I don't look like a guy that would not read and not follow things very well and be Bad with word things.
So Tim looks like that.
[00:47:32] Speaker D: He is the worst of all worlds. He looks like someone who doesn't read books, and he still has to read.
[00:47:37] Speaker A: Books, which means the way I look, I look more intelligent than I am.
[00:47:44] Speaker D: You are projecting a negative view of yourself onto the listeners. They probably think you're the greatest, and so they thought that you look like me.
[00:47:56] Speaker A: Let's vote. All right, I brought it to the table. Here's how my vote's gonna go. Hey, Merry Christmas, you guys.
I love you both very much. Have a happy holiday. This was just some easygoing listening that had a bit of a Christmas in it. It wasn't too deep, and it had Peter Lor, which was a specific gift for Mr. Scrimshaw to have some Peter Lorry in this holiday season. But I will say this. It stands the test of time as a classic. For one thing, that is some damn good Peter Lorre.
[00:48:30] Speaker C: Exactly it of.
You know, even in the stretching material, maybe a little too thin and the lack of a real sort of twist ending, it's such a vehicle for Peter Laurie and a source of joy. Hearing him go nuts, hearing him enact this evil plan, hearing him get caught.
It's a delight.
[00:48:49] Speaker D: Yeah, Peter Laurie, always a classic for me. I'm sure there's some listeners who are like, oh, I'm gonna skip this one. That Peter Laurie is in it.
[00:48:56] Speaker C: So see that screamy guy?
[00:48:58] Speaker D: What are those guys talking about? And their faces aren't right either.
But I love Peter Laurie. And yeah, I think the script is pretty rickety. I'm kind of on the fence. I'm interested in what you guys think about standing the test of time in that there's a point at which characterizations are so outdated, yet they are still recognizable tropes that I think it makes them accessible. I mean, the hen pecked husband, the nagging wife, the young woman with daddy issues, those are all unattractive tropes today, but people would instantly recognize them and they would still function as the narrative shortcuts they functioned as in 1943.
[00:49:40] Speaker C: It's weird. The almost completely gratuitous holiday theme to it, which has almost no actual story element, puts it in the context that, for me makes it like, oh, this old trope. It creates a box for it where a little old fashionedness is desirable.
[00:49:58] Speaker A: He's just happy to have a holiday Christmas episode that was suspenseful in horror and wasn't softening it up and being goofy for the holidays.
[00:50:09] Speaker D: No, it's perfect in that way, in that it's not great. But it's not difficult to listen to. Correct. It's very easy and fun to listen to, even though intellectually you're like, no.
[00:50:18] Speaker A: Dumb while you're decorating.
[00:50:20] Speaker C: I just watched Spirited and had almost that same reaction.
[00:50:23] Speaker A: Oh, we're gonna talk off the air. I want to find out more. Yeah, this is a great thing to put on while you're decorating the tree.
[00:50:30] Speaker C: I'm probably gonna get some blowback about that.
[00:50:32] Speaker D: Honey, I have the perfect tree. Decorating?
[00:50:35] Speaker A: What?
[00:50:35] Speaker D: No.
[00:50:36] Speaker A: No. Could you hand me another bulb?
[00:50:39] Speaker B: No.
[00:50:42] Speaker C: Why are you decorating a tree in the basement?
[00:50:46] Speaker D: My devil's Christmas tree.
[00:50:48] Speaker A: It is where my comic books will go. Why are you talking like that? Tim?
Hey, Tim, tell them more stuff. Please go visit ghoulishlights.com oh, not bad. Oh, thank you.
[00:50:58] Speaker C: It is the home of this podcast. You'll find other episodes there. You can leave comments, you can vote in polls, let us know what you think about these episodes. You can reach out to us if you have requests for episodes. You can make them and we'll consider them.
[00:51:14] Speaker D: We are benevolent like that.
[00:51:17] Speaker C: You can link to our threadless store and get some swag and you can link to our Patreon store. It's not a store. You can link to Patreon.
[00:51:25] Speaker D: It's kind of a store. You give us money. Yeah, you can call it whatever you want if you sign up for Patreon. I don't care. Just go to patreon.com themorals and who knows what you might find there. Maybe an all Peter Lorre impression podcast. Okay, what if it's now officially become an idea? That's dangerous.
But yes, we have all sorts of great extra content. We also hang out with our patrons via my mysterious old book club and monthly happy hours. And so yes, sign up, support us and make us happy.
[00:52:03] Speaker A: You could also buy a Patreon at the Patreon store.
[00:52:07] Speaker D: Yes, well, you could buy a patron membership for a loved one. Or even an enemy. If they really hate old time radio.
[00:52:16] Speaker C: Someone actually did ask. And actually buying a subscription as a gift is tough in the mechanics of Patreon, but you can work it out.
[00:52:24] Speaker D: Yeah, if you really love the person, you'll figure it out.
[00:52:29] Speaker A: Hey, if you'd like to see us performing live, the mysterious old Radio Listening Society theater group, which is us plus Shannon Custer, perform audio drama live on stage every month we perform classic recreations of old time great radio shows, sometimes not so great. And we do a lot of our own original work as well. We're performing somewhere every month. All you have to do is go to ghoulishdelights.com or mysteriousoldradiolisteningsociety.com and you will see links to where we're performing this month and what we're performing, what date. And if you can't make it in person, part of your Patreon benefits subscription is that we've. Film and videotape are. What is the right word? Film, videotape, record. I don't know anymore.
[00:53:13] Speaker C: We use our Super 8 camera.
[00:53:15] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[00:53:16] Speaker C: Anyway, you can film it.
[00:53:17] Speaker D: You can watch the etchings of our performance.
[00:53:21] Speaker A: It's one of those trial artists for the news.
[00:53:27] Speaker D: It's just caricatures.
[00:53:31] Speaker C: See our airbrushed van.
[00:53:34] Speaker A: You get to see us performing live as part of your subscription because you'll get access to that video. We'll go with video.
[00:53:41] Speaker D: Sure.
[00:53:41] Speaker A: Hey, what's coming up next?
[00:53:43] Speaker C: Up next, we're gonna go one more time. No, not just one more time. Again to the Signalman.
This time we're listening to Adaptation by Nightfall. Until then.
[00:54:02] Speaker D: Welcome to the All Peter Lorre Impressions Podcast. In honor of the holiday season, we present a reading of before the Ice Is in the Pools by Emily Dickinson. Read to you by Peter Lorre.
[00:54:20] Speaker G: Before the ice is in the pools.
[00:54:24] Speaker D: Before the skaters go Are any cheek at nightfall is tarnished by the snow.
[00:54:32] Speaker G: Before the fields have finished before the.
[00:54:35] Speaker D: Christmas tree Wonder upon wonder will arrive to me what we touch the hymns of On a summer's day what is only walking Just a bridge away Death which sings so speak so when there's no one here Wield a frock I.
[00:55:01] Speaker G: Wept in Answer me to where.